Nixie Fae 🏳️‍⚧️

A crying guillotine says "I'm so hungry".

I didn't realize it at the time, but I was such a fucking mess this time last year. I'm proud of myself for being more put together and functional now. Still hate February, but I'm doing better than last year.

I want to be happy again. I want to enjoy my life.

I am a miserable person and I wish i knew how to stop. I hate this fucking town. I can't be myself here and it is suffocating me. I fucking hate everyone here.

Wish I were 5 inches shorter and had bigger tits.

I wish i were actually beautiful.

Gonna be trying to read more books this year, of whatever variety ends up in my lap. First book of the year was The Clockwork Three by Matthew J. Kirby. It was cute and fun. I liked the characters.

I feel like I need to try and switch jobs and work somewhere I can get tips. Always wanted to try bartending or waitressing.

Forensic analysis of objective video evidence. This is how you serve readers searching for clarity.

🚨BREAKING: ICE SHOOTS AND KILL WOMAN in Minneapolis YouTube video by Status Coup News

Please share.. ICE THUGS shot & killed a woman in Minneapolis. Then attack citizens point blank with teargas grenades, pepper ball guns & chemical spray in the faces. Of course, Greg Bovino was in the mix. He needs to be brought up for murder charges.🤬🤬🤬🤬🤬
youtu.be/LnfiWmX_mTE?...

I want to start writing again. A diary, a short story, idk. Even just writing lists used to help me a lot lol. But I want to.. Do something. Make something. I need a creative outlet and I don't have a computer I can do very much on anymore.

I can do this.

I need to start doing things for myself again instead of putting off my life until a more convenient time. There's never gonna be a more convenient time than now I'm learning.

I want to have a social life again. I used to not be able to shut up, but I guess I've become more timid and reserved in the last couple years.

1. I'm going to switch to injections for my HRT.

Sure why not. I doubt I'll get enough likes to be overwhelming, maybe enough to be fun tho.

1 like = 1 plan for 2026

Happy new year. My goal this year is to try and be truer to myself and get out of survival mode. Try to discover who I am again.

Can’t help but notice my mood seems to be affected somewhat by how close to destitution I am

Last year I wore a dress on new years eve. I don't think I would fit into it again this year and I don't feel pretty enough to wear dresses anymore tho.

this year was kind of trash tbh

I survived. Ate chips and ice cream when I got home. Time for falling asleep with my favourite comfort movie. Hopefully I'll feel more stable tomorrow. Good night 💜

I want to just curl up in a corner on the floor and cry. But I'm at work alone for another hour.

I haven't felt this stressed out and hopeless in awhile. I'm so fucking sick of trying so hard and nothing changing. I don't even feel like a fucking person anymore, just a thing for society to use up. I'm just a fucking NPC. There's no room for me to have a life in this world. I'm just a thing.

And I have been terrified of trying to socially engage on the internet since the last few disasters I had on discord and Twitter.

I miss having community but I don't know how to escape isolation in this bullshit world. I've been banished to living in a backward bullshit nowhere town full of ignorant selfish bigoted white assholes.

I used to have no problem being an asshole and standing up for myself or whatever, but now I am timid and weak and I fucking hate it. I hate what trying to survive has turned me into. So much of what I loved about myself has been beaten and squeezed out of me by threats of homelessness and hunger.

There is something off about me today, I feel much more sensitive and on edge than usual

I haven't had more than 4 days off in a row in like 2 fucking years. I am sick of working my ass off and just barely surviving I want to fucking break down and cry I just want to be able to move home, I'm sick of this shitty backwards nowhere town. 😭

I hate people hate people hate people I hate people I fucking hate humans hate people

I'm so tired of shitty people