My theory is that the abs are a cosmetic body modification to make him look more intimidating, not natural muscles

If it's fixable it isn't fucked

playing guitar hero turned me into green yuri

You've got them on the back foot! Now is the time to keep pressing, not for compromise! Why are you so quick to surrender the upper hand???

My high school boyfriend told me he was diagnosed anti-social and I thought he was just telling me he was introverted

Sometimes you don't realize how much you were walking on eggshells until you start doing your eggshell dance for a new person and they react with confusion and concern for your well being

Isn't that the plot of Pink Flamingos?

Do male attorneys in the US get recruiters reaching out to them about legal assistant and paralegal positions? I have this happen to me frequently

I'm not monogamous, I'm just currently polysaturated with one partner

LEAVE MY DAMB CREATURES ALONE!!!!! IM OVER HERE TRYEN TO PLAY NORMAL SHIT AND YOUR DOIN SOME SHIT CALLED TREASURE TOKEN AND "SACK" LEAVE MY DAMB CREATURES ALONE,,,, AND DA TEXT " I WILL NEVER PLAY CEDH I NEED MORE TURNS TO PLAY MY CARDS, I DONT KNOW HOW TO DO ALL THE COMBOS, LEAVE MY CREATURES ALONE, STOP, LEAVE THEM ALONE!!! REAL MAGIC DECK'S ARE BRACKET 3 OR LESS " - LEGALIZE CHAOS ORB OR AT LEAST LET ME THROW SOMETHING ELSE ON THE TABLE - DASHARE.ZONE ADMIN

NO COMBO'S NO BULL SHIT I ONLY PLAY REAL MAGIC CARD'S - dashare.zone ADMIN

A watched email never arrives

I think it is unfortunate that the narrative has caught hold that suicidality is due to an actual or perceived lack of love. When I was suicidal I had people who I knew loved me and I loved them. I was just in so much anguish and it felt like there was no other way out

My mom was so hellbent on her children eating black eyed peas on new year's day for good luck that she would put black eyed peas in tootsie rolls for us like she was giving a pill to a dog

(wakes up hungover, two fingers on my monkeys paw curled) ah shit what did i do last night

Have you played Hypnospace Outlaw?

Me: I feel like expressing my desires is manipulative because someone might do something because I want it and not because they want it.

Therapist: ...

Therapist: Yeah we're going to work on that.

!!!!!!!!!!!!! go see guillermo del torro's frankenstein !!!!!!!! GO SEE GUILLERMO DEL TORRO'S FRANKENSTEIN !!!!!!!!!! G O S E E G U I L L E R M O D E L T O R R O ' S F R A N K E N S T E I N ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !

An extra hour of sleep for one day and then it is dark at 5pm. Somewhere, a monkey's paw curls

Why is there only one brand of internal condoms in the US and why is it prescription only??? Yes I know the answer is misogyny but I'm upset

Confusing the receptionist at the Dr.'s office by actually wanting to read the documents I'm signing and asking for a paper copy of the consent form that explicitly states that I can ask for a paper copy

Oh that's really bad

Autocorrect keeps changing "food" to "good" and other incomprehensible substitutions for real words

JB Pritzker looking at prosecuting ICE agents in Chicago Illinois Governor J.B. Pritzker has suggested that state prosecutors might examine the conduct of ICE agents.

Good. Even if this doesn’t work, it’s time to go on offense.

www.newsweek.com/jb-pritzker-...

Rumi's poetry is like scripture to me

Crème Fouettée, Crème à la Chantilly “It’s only whipped cream.”

Life is either boredom or whipped cream. - Voltaire

The most fun thing about researching the history of whipped cream is discovering that for centuries before it became a topping, whipped cream WAS the dessert!

jamieschler.substack.com/p/creme-foue...

I'm getting a divorce and my family and friends have come together to support me. I've never felt so loved in my life! How did I let myself be so lonely in my marriage for so long?

The lion does not concern himself with the midterm elections

This is the same woman who showed up unannounced at our apartment early in our marriage. We had company over and didn't even know she was in the state. She handed her son his baby teeth and then left. She's a bit of an odd duck

I'm getting a divorce and my MIL came over to support my STB Ex and went on a cleaning and organizing spree. I'm sleeping in the office and I brought my vibrator with me in a duffel bag. My MIL came in and organized away my duffel and left my vibrator out on the floor 🙃

Stay gold Ponyboy