Tenspeed and/or Brownshoe

Best way to serve a cocktail?

In his head, the bus was "WHITES ONLY".

"Other than that, how was the play, Mrs. Lincoln?"

If his mouth is half full, then he's an optimist.

"Why oh fuckin' why are they so goddamn obsessed with other people's genitals & what they're doing with them?! THAT IS FUCKING WEIRD STOP DOING IT NOW."- me, screaming in spite of the fact I'm getting high af at the moment.

"Hey- it's my twin brother, Fishface McMilquetoast, from another mother!"

I BELIEVE IN YOU.

Anytime after six works- I'm buying a gently used bovine autoclave from Facebook Marketplace, then I need to call a guy about rock stains- like, what does that even mean?! Are the rocks stained?! Do the rocks cause staining?! Do the stains resemble rocks?!

As a member of Gen X, I know what Russia is capable of, because I watched documentaries like Wargames & Red Dawn.

Study history. The Terminator & Maximum Overdrive were not isolated events.

Summit might have just inspired me to be a better human.

So...gauch-nos?

All I'm saying is, if you ever need some help with that, let me know, I can bring some cat handcuffs, a sheet of Charles Nelson Reilly blotter acid, & some pinecone scented enemas, & we will par-fuckin'-ty.

I thought that was Everything I Do, I Do All Over You?!

So she had, what, a penis reduction?

This has now resulted in me launching the drink Formerly Known As Being In My Mouth across the room.

David Simon is fucking epic.

Have we reached the L.A. Confidential part of this conversation yet...?!

Same.

I live in Lawrence & look forward to going full John Brown any goddamn second now...

This was fuckin' FANTASTIC!

Agree completely, ICP, but I still need clarity on how the fuck magnets work.

So it wasn't...baa-aaaa-d?

I'll show myself out.

Trigger, Willie Nelson's guitar.

I want to get high with & from this guitar.

Well, fucking FANTASTIC.

Fuck Tom Cotton.

"Look, Ted Bundy is respected, he's honest..."

"HOW ABOUT REVIVING COMMON SENSE?! DON'T KNOW WHAT MY ASSHOLE FATHER IN LAW WOULD DO WITH A GODDAMN ELEPHANT, BUT HE COULD ABSOLUTELY USE A FUCKIN' REALITY CHECK!"

Let us dream, man.

FUCKING EPIC.

Fuckin' SMACKDOWN.