Ryan Kohn

I... didn't know this was a thing you could do. Ravens just said "lol nvm"?????

Early contender for Funniest Sports Happening of 2026

“Ovi vs. Pasta” also happens 41 times a year at Mamma Lucia’s

Yes, 100%

Me today:

Of course, there’s a chance the team brings him back this summer, or Carlson hangs up the skates entirely. If one of those things happen, this is an unqualified win. But man, is he gonna look weird in anything other than red, white and blue.

Can’t remember the last time I was this torn on a trade. Any time you can get a first-round pick+ for a descending player in a contract year, you should probably do that. On the other hand… it’s John Carlson. Not a perfect player, but a blue-line stalwart and a franchise legend. And now he’s a Duck?

…the Capitals did what

Maybe Vance Honeycutt is simply the greatest pinch hitter/defensive replacement of all time time. Have we all considered that

We gotta step up the levels of Guy Remembering on display here. Kerry Kittles played for like a decade and averaged 14 PPG on some teams that made decent playoff runs, including reaching the NBA Finals. That is kind of the opposite of obscure.

Anyway my answer is Greivis Vásquez

Outside of the people starting literal wars, I really think Kalshi and Polymarket are the biggest threats we have in terms of the total collapse of society

If quarterbacking was all about throwing bombs and not about things like “decision making” and “throwing accurately into tight windows,” Drew Allar would be such a sick QB. Alas,

Thank you for your service 🫡

I can't get over this number: in 2007, there were 360,000 newspaper jobs. Now, there are 80,000. "My local paper sucked!" Sure. What sucks even more? The void. "I get all my news from the Guardian!" No, the Guardian doesn't report on your town council, your school board, local cops.

dawg🥹

Ah man the Johnny Hockey jersey, now I'm a wreck

CONNOR HELLEBUYCK WE'RE MAKING STATUES OF YOU BRO

normies: more Olympic hockey overtime!!!! so exciting

hockey fans: once again we are subjected to The Great Travesty

Regardless of the results here, they've gotta end this "3 on 3 OT at the Olympics" thing. Feels like an insult to the sport.

The Orioles, every year:

Tweet from a loser that says, "I will have 30k to make a fully AI film, what’s the plan? I’m supposed to have ideas by next week. cmon guys what would you want to see? I like sci-fi but it feels to obvious for AI 🤷‍♂️"

AI filmmaking is completely unserious.

You've got people with $30k begging the internet for ideas by next week because they have nothing of their own to say, it's just slop for the sake of slop. Embarrassing state of affairs.

Sometimes the obvious moves are the right ones. WaPo’s idiocy will be the Banner’s gain.

Might wanna read the tweet you’ve copy and pasted before sending it next time!

Going to feel even worse when a pitcher shows up to spring training with a months-long injury that no one knew about, as is tradition

a Norwegian man crying on air while being interviewed, with his biathlon stats besides him

In the interview with NRK, he first started by thanking everyone who has helped him on the path to his first individual Olympic medal. And then – unprompted – he made an admission: – And then there's someone I wanted to share it with who might not be watching today. Six months ago I met the love of my life. The most beautiful and kindest person in the world. Three months ago I made my biggest mistake and cheated on her, and I told her about it a week ago. It's been the worst week of my life, he says tearfully in the interview.

new most bizarre moment of the Olympics just dropped

Norwegian biathlete wins bronze medal, then, totally unprompted, reveal he cheated on his GF, she left him, and he wants to apologize publicly hoping she takes him back

www.vg.no/sport/i/vr5g...

It has a "Michael Mann's Miami Vice" amount of jargon in it for sure, watching it makes me feel like I have a concussion, but weirdly that's part of what I like about it!

(Post a banger not in English)

One of my favorite beats, and these dudes can really rap:

It looks like Da Finchman’s done it again!

Basically yes (The Adventures of Cliff Booth, directed by David Fincher!)