The Sweary Unicorn

He’s a fucking fake fucking fucker!!!!

That’ll learn me for reading sn email before coffee 🤦‍♀️

Just saw a photo of the birthday cake they got for niece’s 18th. I know it probably felt weird to them (if they even considered it) to ask me to make one but I’ve only ever missed making cakes for 1 or 2 other birthdays 😢

His need to tell me about how bad the traffic was (or not) every time he comes to walk the dogs is helping me look forward to having less contact with him 🤭

time for me (& because of my health and their families busy-ness I see less of them.)

Not that I have to be important to any kids, but it’s hard not to worry about old age & ending up alone/lonely.

some friendships which means I’m not part of their kids lives.
Between the heartbreak of being childless & my health constraints, I’m already not the Aunt I want to be, and now I’m losing the niece and nephew I’ve been the closest to.
As my goddaughter & her sister become teenagers, they have less

Feeling like I’m losing so many relationships, but just my marriage, on top of all the others I’ve list throughout my life. Always thought I’d be an important adult in kids lives, but I lost access to/connection with the kids I nannied in my 20s when the parents & I had a falling out. Have lost

Not that I would have gone but it feels weird not to be invited to or even told about nieces 18th birthday party…..I could have made her birthday cake even if I hadn’t gone, but I guess that might have felt weird for them to ask.

I dunno, am I even her aunt still?

TFW the penny drops and you realise his mansplaining and “just showing he cares questions” has undermined you self confidence and self worth 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️

“Sadie and Maple are incredibly important to both of us. I’m not in a position to care for them, but I’d really like to keep things as they are for now, where I regularly walk them.”

They’re important to you? Really? And yet you made no attempt to find accomodation that would allow you to have them

Gathering a few things to declutter by selling them at the local carboot sale…unintentionally a large number of them were wedding presents 🥴

Well, well, he finally found out somehow about my thesis making it to the Dean’s list/me being finished ….dont know how because he never asked me about it!

Based on the CC statement he’s booked an overseas trip - love how there’s still no discussion with me and he’ll just expect me to deal with the fact he’s not here to walk the dogs for me.

Probably!

Shopping for every meal maybe….or nothing better to do with his time lol

Surprisingly he’s going to help out, though it’s a very constrained help that only just covers what the dogs need

So after barely ever going to the supermarket when he lived with me he now goes to multiple supermarkets in a day….in fact 5 different ones in 2 days!!

Let’s see how much he cares about the dogs now….have asked him to look after them for a week day at the end of the month while I’m at a conference. In the past he’s always said no, so I’m not expecting him to help out but I’m open to being surprised.

It’s so easy to start blaming myself &thinking I should have tried harder/been better. then I remember that he never asks how the dogs are coping, if they’re sleeping ok yet, even though I’ve mentioned them disrupting my sleep for days in a row&that he choose to live somewhere he can’t have the dogs

Well his friends partner just commented on my LinkedIn post so I guess we’ll see how long it takes to travel the grapevine…

(Nothing specific today to induce the swearing, everything just feels like a lot)

Fuck fuck fuckity fuck!

He's having such a cliche midlife crisis....new car...left the wife...joined the gym LOL

Glad he waited til after he'd left before joining the gym, otherwise I'd have to listen to all his comments about weight and weightloss.

Thank you 🥰

He also hasn’t asked me anything about my PhD since the week I submitted (unless he asked in THE conversation but I don’t remember it)…..so he has no idea that I’ve defended it, or that I’ve changed my name 🤷‍♀️ be funny if I make it past graduation without him knowing & then I can just start using Dr

I can’t believe he still hasn’t mentioned anything to do with separating our joint assets etc…. I wonder how long it’ll take him to get sick of financing 2 households….

Weird, the (nice) neighbour has texted in a slightly ambiguous way, which has left me wondering if he spoke to them & has told them some of what’s going on……except it sounds like she thinks I’m not living behind her 🥴

Someone (who knows what’s happening in my life) just asked what my next move is….as if I should have things sorted out already….is there some schedule of time limit I should know about?!

True….in fact he gave me his exact address……

In the past month he’s spent nearly $700 on clothes/shoes….and yet he complains about everything being expensive/our financial situation.

Don’t think I’ll hold off any longer I’m buying the new trainers I need.

Mostly no, because non-consensual intimate images are generated overwhelmingly by men, overwhelmingly targeting women, and New Zealand demonstrably employs misogyny as a tool in every sphere of life with zero qualms whatsoever, including our media, our politicians, and as evidenced here, our policy.