Not great, Bob!

The price rise was set by an algorithm that noticed how many people were dumping their subscriptions

Yeah he gamed the system. We were all there and saw him gaming the system. It’s when the conversation leans towards hacks and vote alteration that I start to get stabby.

Noted fucking idiot Elon Musk? That Elon Musk?

Trump attending the dignified transfer of servicemembers, saluting and wearing one of his many tacky fucking baseball caps

He’s getting a dog. An adorable beagle.

Photo of a small printed card on a wooden surface titled “WINDOWS PC IMPORTANT USE TIPS.” On the left is a large red speech-bubble icon with a white exclamation mark. On the right is printed text that reads: “This OWC storage solution comes APFS pre-formatted for instant use with Macs, iPads, and iPhones. If you're a PC user, don't worry—simply reformat using OWC's free Drive Guide (https://start.owc.com/driveguide/win) or another utility for full Windows compatibility. For optimal performance on Windows, ensure your PC is set to ‘Better Performance’ instead of ‘Quick Removal.’ This can be adjusted in Windows Disk Management, or you can use OWC's Disk Performance utility (https://go.owc.com/diskperformance/win) for a quick and easy setup.”

As a Mac user in the 90s, this shit warms my heart

“Strambiguity”

California:

Screengrab from "The Simpsons" showing Todd Flanders raising his arms excitedly. Caption at the top reads “I’M A SURFER!” Todd’s wearing a T-shirt where the visible text reads “Buttho Surfers”

Oooo… the other shoe drops!

“Wagner’s early work was a little too new wave for my tastes, but when Der fliegende Holländer came out in '43…”

My family has always been a Headless Honda Days family

Thune’s “$900M a day is a lot, but the budget we passed gives the military an obscene amount of money, so don’t worry we good” kinda missed the point of the question

You’ve stayed USB-C-free all the way into 2026? Perhaps it’s time

30 countries use mail voting

Is this a wedding ceremony, or…?

“We’re working on the same deal with Iran… just a few kinks left to iron out.”

Show some guts! Brian want cheap oil!

🎉☀️🎉☀️🎉☀️ YOU MADE IT! 🎉☀️🎉☀️🎉☀️🎉☀️ The clocks changed and today the sun didn't set until 7.11pm! WOO! I'm so proud of you for sticking through this, and I'll see you next year.

WATCH: Dignified transfer ceremony held for US service members killed in Iran conflict | Fox News Video Six fallen U.S. service members killed during the conflict in Iran were transferred at Dover Air Force Base in a dignified transfer ceremony attended by President Donald Trump.

A longer cut of the actual video is up, but the shorter incorrect version remains

My eye’s twitching at that upper left TV

“They are very inaccurate with their munitions, which is why we had to go to war with them, because we were under imminent threat from their munitions.”

…help restore public confidence in the president’s immigration agenda, which will continue unchanged from before, regardless of which titular figurehead is anointed to get shoved in front of cameras

Aging is a ceaseless drip of new items added to your to-do list of daily tasks that keep your body moderately functional

Accusing reporters of asking “stupid questions” is his out to keep from having to answer the question. It works because reporters let it work.

They need to stop letting it work.

Clean, Pricey Oil™

[the “paint mixer” stage spattering all the walls of the chamber]