I wrote this article last week, then yesterday the DNC reveals their fight song. They even used "onward" just as I predicted.
29.08.2025 11:03
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I wrote this article last week, then yesterday the DNC reveals their fight song. They even used "onward" just as I predicted.
Now that Trump is rewriting the history at Smithsonian museums, we found his updated timeline of world events.
My piece is now available on Points in Case. Enjoy the allegory while you still can. Thanks @pointsincase.com!
My newest satirical guidebook is out now! Learn about conspiracy theorists, snake oil peddlers, and far-right whackos. I answer the question, "how the hell did we get here?" a.co/d/dj9nR0q
Welcome to the American Wonka iPhone Factory! Bringing jobs back for citizens and Oompas alike.
"This vandalism has to stop. Please. I am in no way affiliated with the National Socialist Party. I just really love my Luftschiff Zeppelin 129 Hindenburg Premium XL." Cybertruck owners take note.
Forget tariffs and social security, there is a far greater danger brewing in government right now.
Why can't the US be more like South Korea in dealing with their leaders. Instead we are North Korea.
Warning for all your Spring Break travelers: “Exercise increased caution due to inconsistent availability of affordable healthcare services, increased incidents of crypto-crime, and South African dweebs.”
I'm glad Trump is finally bringing the tariff hammer down on the alliance of uninhabited islands, coral atolls, barrier reefs, brackish lagoons, and deep-sea trenches.
It's about time we show those coral atolls whose boss.
And not a single one wanted to host Usha Vance
Europe reporting in, ready to support sleepless America
I'll never forget my dinner with Elon, so I've shared the story with others. You may need a drink, I know I did.
Just need to add Elon Musk in a basket up front a la E.T.
Is beatboxing allowed during filibusters? Asking for a friend.
Enjoy our inflight entertainment with exclusive access to classified military operations and Russian state television.
It is morning here, it is great to read it all. It is like showing up to a party and everyone is drunk but not quite sloppy
It will be funny when JD Vance goes to hell, like Curb closing music for eternity
Followed by the 21-breast salute
*Third Reich
And crickets at night doing the same thing. Nature: a beautiful coital cacophony
JD Vance Welcomes You To The New And Improved Smithsonian, now with 75% less history and culture.
When I see an empty frozen pizza box in the public park trash, I take a moment to stop and marvel at the mysteries of life.
"Western civilization is definitely worth saving, people. But not the liberal values part, of course. I don’t mean the democracy part either. Or the shared ethical values. Or that stuff Jesus said about love and forgiveness."
That is a look. I would totally read his book where he finally reveals where he hid the bodies.
Stuck in an infinite managerial loop. A Space Karen Mobius strip
Everyone has their own kink.