Sorry for the rant, it's just a feeling that has been persistently part of me now that I can't shake off, and I can't stand it. I just can't see myself as anything more than a horrible person anymore.
@razorie
[Graduated 29/9/24 - No more streams] Rae for short! β Artist, Animator(?), Streamer, Content Creator, VTuber β #Babiniku Digital Maiden β Lan: English/Malay/Mandarin/Japanese β Banner by: @lazurinerozu.bsky.social
Sorry for the rant, it's just a feeling that has been persistently part of me now that I can't shake off, and I can't stand it. I just can't see myself as anything more than a horrible person anymore.
Since the second half of 2025, I'd been so guilt-ridden that I barely felt like I was in control of my thoughts. I blamed myself endlessly for being so flawed, so fake, being a bad friend and lowkey for even existing.
No matter what I do, I can't forget that feeling and it scares me so much.
Saying 67 ironically has ruined me because I can't even count normally anymore ππ
I didn't know I could open PDF files using Apex Legends.
Turns out I was not overthinking and in fact I was doing the exact amount of thinking I needed and I still got hurt even though I preempted it :D
TGIF!!! What are everyone's plans this weekend?
It hurts so much to try and maintain and salvage a connection that's not meant to be. I'm so tired. I'm done.
It hurts so so much, but at some point I just have to say "thanks for everything" and move on.
Do you all ever get executive dysfunction from being lonely?
I constantly have the feeling that"I need to get this done but there's no one here chatting or hanging out with me and that somehow prevents me from getting this done."
I appreciate that bunni!! At this point I hope I can catch a break and have something go my way for once xD
I don't mean it in like a "oh no woe is me I'm depressed" kinda way.. I mean it in a "every time my body gets a sense of what happiness could feel like, something bad comes along and make sure I know my place" kinda way.
I sometimes feel like the universe is telling me I don't deserve to be happy. Or rather, it's like it wants me to be terrified of my own happiness. It's telling me that I should be forbidden from wishing to be happy.
Every time I think about my crush, my heart beats so intensely fast I feel it might burst at any time. I've been feeling this way for the past half a year now.
Recently I came to understand something called limerence and everything clicked all of a sudden. π
What the fuck do you mean I took 3 lessons, two small naps, ate food, did laundry and my weekends are over??
What do I have to do to become a girl? The gender envy I've been getting these past few years has been unbearable. If I wake up one more day as a male I think I'm going to go feral..
Mentally fighting between "If they really care about you they'd put in the effort" and "They have their own life to live, they're busy and you're not entitled to their time" sucks soo badd. It makes you feel like your worth is so insignificant.
You guys ever attached all your self worth onto one person or one thing and then things end up not working out and then you're left feeling like you don't deserve to exist?
Asking for a friend.
I think it's the zoomies hahaha, I'm so conditioned to doing things quickly and settling things fast, that's why that tends to happen a lot xD
Recently I've been pretty self-conscious about how unmindful I am. Casually dropping things on the floor, making careless mistakes, knocking my head on things, being forgetful..
My brain feels so tiny..
Honestly, being a confused closeted π³οΈββ§οΈ and having a crush on someone is a really garbage feeling because it feels like true happiness will never be available to you either way.
Caught a cold from overexertion, I'm in so much pain aaaa
Instructions unclear, now I bring myself down and put others on a pedestal.
To be honest, a lot of times people need to realise that they don't need to bring others down to raise themselves up.
Tuesday...
Is it just me or has Twitter become more like Facebook 10 years ago within the last month or so?
This Tuesday makes me want to cry.
Reposting this every Tuesday.
cyndaquil's trip through time
Siri, how do I confess my feelings?
Fuck this Tuesday in particular
I feel this in my soul