Cow.exe

One day. One day we will get our muppets.

Looked up why my mouth is so dry and I’m sorry to announce but I have Alzheimer’s

It’s been ten years since the last muppet movie. Please Disney I’m on my hands and knees.

Perfect.

So like theoretically… roller blades on a treadmill. Fun?Broken Legs? Both? What are we looking at?

If anyone needs me later today I’ll be taking a whole bag of edibles and staring at the ceiling until I can finally get some fucking rest

Well here we are again, it’s like Déjà vu but instead of a strange feeling of nostalgia, I want to step into the middle of the interstate

Remembered my password we are so back

In a “steal obscure signs” kinda mood today

My fortune cookie had no fortune, am I gonna die?

I don’t know who has to hear this but you should lay on the floor for 5-10 minutes

Ya I have ADHD out the ass but I’m actually unmedicated haha *takes violent hit of my pen*

Getting older is realizing pistachio ice cream is actually fucking awesome

In a “big sword” mood rn. IYKYK

just downloaded the bluesky app so i can post directly from my phone! no more time-consuming trips to city hall

I’m sure tagging a shark is hard and takes a lot of training and all that but realistically, give me a 12 pack of pbrs, 3 joints, some cool ranch doritoes, a raft, and a camel back pack and I’ll have 15 of those fuckers tracked by sunset

Tony soprano is so cool, I wish all the Italians didn’t go extinct

Marvel executives finally getting me to watch secret wars:

No there’s also my parent’s house I think

Just dipped cake in milk. Life changing.

Fine dining

God I fucking love this place already

We cock dick balling FR fr tonight