Why was the shirt happy to hang around the tank top? Because it was armless
11.03.2026 09:12
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Why was the shirt happy to hang around the tank top? Because it was armless
How do you get a baby alien to sleep? You rocket.
Why can't eggs have love? They will break up too soon.
Want to hear a chimney joke? Got stacks of em! First one's on the house
Did you know Albert Einstein was a real person? All this time, I thought he was just a theoretical physicist!
I started a new business making yachts in my attic this year...the sails are going through the roof
They laughed when I said I wanted to be a comedian – they’re not laughing now.
What did one nut say as he chased another nut? I'm a cashew!
I asked my date to go to the gym the other day. They never showed up. That's when I knew we wouldn't work out.
What biscuit does a short person like? Shortbread.
What's the worst thing about ancient history class? The teachers tend to Babylon.
Two parrots are sitting on a perch. One turns to the other and asks, "do you smell fish?"
What do you call a fly without wings? A walk.
The urge to sing the Lion King song is just a whim away.
The best time on a clock is 6:30--hands down.
How many apples grow on a tree? All of them!
Slept like a log last night … woke up in the fireplace.
I don’t play soccer because I enjoy the sport. I’m just doing it for kicks.
Why did the cookie cry? It was feeling crumby.
I don't trust sushi, there's something fishy about it.
Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools!
A termite walks into a bar and asks “Is the bar tender here?”
I made a belt out of watches once... It was a waist of time.
Yesterday a clown held a door open for me. I thought it was a nice jester.
What did the big flower say to the littler flower? Hi, bud!
I boiled a funny bone last night and had a laughing stock
Me and my mates are in a band called Duvet. We're a cover band.
My friend keeps telling me "Cheer up. You aren't stuck in a deep hole in the ground, filled with water."
I know he means well.
Why does a chicken coop only have two doors? Because if it had four doors it would be a chicken sedan.
What did the ocean say to the shore? Nothing, it just waved.