emma

stressed; cant sleep

anyway, it was so windy today

my parents are deep in denial. they believe it's because of my long hair

got kicked out of the men’s bathroom for the first time 😅

when i got off the bus today, there was so much snow between the sidewalk and the back door, so i ran to the front door. i said to the driver "there's so much snow today ^-^", then looked at the front door... and there was also a big mountain of snow 😅

i say my deadname which is clearly masc, and some people still ask me my pronouns or gender me fem (which is a win, it’s just that idk what to do and i’m not used to it yet lol)

i’m still not out in everyday life, but it’s getting so messy quickly with hrt lol 🫠

blåhaj and estradiol pills on a bed.

feeding the shark

am i awake at 4 in the morning? yes. do i have school at 9 am? yes.

pov you see people wearing running shoes in the snow and you know they are visiting the city

every trans woman faces a moment in her life where if she isn't careful she'll suddenly be a journalist or an author

not at all. i have toxic relationships with some people in my life and i still have a hard time recognizing it

lmao my dad loves to sing along chappell roan's songs, maybe he should learn about the values carried by these songs

this time i made a list of topics that i need to address at my appointment at the health clinic to not go into full on adhd emma

thank you for listening me rambling

pov you’re in an online meeting boymoding, but it seems that you’re slowly failing at boymoding

i used to be able to eat a box of 30 rice krispies treats in an evening and still want more. now, i eat a box of 8, and i am satisfied haha

is sugar sweeter when you’re on hrt?

i’m still not used to freezing, and now i understand why some people go so often to starbucks

cried this morning at school, but feeling better this evening

they can continue dreaming about their boy five years ago who was an empty shell, undiagnosed, without a hobby, without friends... that kid doesn't exist anymore

my dad always tell me i'm "sick [deadname]" (i didn't tell them my preferred name yet). can i just be me me sometimes?

they wonder why i never tell them anything personal to them. well, it might be because they are using what i tell them to hurt me. i never get to discuss about random things with my parents. it's always about my challenges and they make me feel like i'm a nuisance

they only talk about their needs and never listen to me. they constantly remind me of how i was a good kid five fucking years ago, and how one day, i'll thank them for their help. it's so toxic. sure, i have major issues that are impacting them, but they are my parents. i'm not their parent

i'm considering dropping out of school, moving to another city, and finding whatever job i can find, as it would allow me to escape my toxic parents. i just want to vanish from their lifes

how should i deal with finding a part-time student job and being 1.5 month on hrt? should i wait a few more months before looking for a part-time student job?

i think i hate winter now

went down a reddit rabbit hole about toxic parenting

the wayfinding at my school is so bad that i’ve been thinking about making signs and putting them up

my mom: i disapprove you taking hrt

also my mom: which pronouns do you want to use? pleaseeeee tell me what makes you happy

yellow bag containing medications, airpods, lip balm, a battery pack, and a lot of scrunchies.

please judge me