Feats of Strength 💙 Trauma Healing

Too often, asking "why" is a red herring driven by our trauma b/c we often conclude: "I must have deserved it."

The "why" is often just this: We were surround by cruel or incompetent people when we were young & vulnerable. This is the only answer that is correct.

Remember & recover. ❤️‍🩹

Too often, asking "why" is a red herring driven by our trauma b/c we often conclude: "I must have deserved it."

The "why" is often just this: We were surround by cruel or incompetent people when we were young & vulnerable. This is the only answer that is correct.

Remember & recover. ❤️‍🩹

New open-access article in British Medical Journal, aims to "explain what C-PTSD is, how to recognise it, and the fundamentals of management, acknowledging that the evidence base continues to grow and evolve."

Infinite gratitude to Judith Herman who gave a name to complex trauma and starting the conversation about its impacts on the lives of millions of survivors. 🙏🏼❤️‍🩹
#internationalwomensday

Infinite gratitude to Judith Herman who gave a name to complex trauma and starting the conversation about its impacts on the lives of millions of survivors. 🙏🏼❤️‍🩹
#internationalwomensday

but for all that I've lost too or never even tried.

I try to work from a seat in my values, not my shame, so that still allows for "hard work," but with none of the downsides. I mean, I'm not perfect with this new process, but it has it moments of working well.

That's a good question. My hyper-productivity was driven by shame and the search for perfection - which also had the impact of lots of self-sabotage/avoidance, so I messed up a lot of opportunities I worked hard to achieve. Self-compassion really was a revelation, not only for the perfectionism...

I remember when I was still trying positive affirmations, the only one that didn't make me cringe was, "I know how to work my ass off!"

Now I can see my hypervigilence protector part shaking his head in wild agreement! 😆

💯Its precisely that cringe feeling that proves were going against our old programming. All the small posotove thoughts matter ❤️‍🩹

Welcome to Bluesky! There’s a great & supportive community here. Writing has been an important part of my trauma recovery toolkit, helps make order of the chaos and so much else. Glad you are here! ❤️‍🩹

MacGuyver-ing our way through trauma recovery. Let’s be honest: many CPTSD survivors reading this are doing recovery on their own.  No therapist. Limited support. Limited community.  When trauma recovery is discussed on the internet, …

"Read, read, read. Be a sponge. Take everything in. Consider ever resource that speaks to you, no mater how silly it may seem to anyone else. You can do this."
#cptsd

useyourdamnskills.com/2026/03/05/m...

The quality survivors must nourish isn't "hope" - we've seen from our childhoods that hope doesn't often pan out - its curiosity – its creativity – that fuels our recovery.
#cptsd

MacGuyver-ing our way through trauma recovery. Let’s be honest: many CPTSD survivors reading this are doing recovery on their own.  No therapist. Limited support. Limited community.  When trauma recovery is discussed on the internet, …

"Read, read, read. Be a sponge. Take everything in. Consider ever resource that speaks to you, no mater how silly it may seem to anyone else. You can do this."
#cptsd

useyourdamnskills.com/2026/03/05/m...

Many abuse survivors think repeating “I’m not a piece of shit” is positive self-talk. I did.

Saying “I love & care for myself” can feel awkward & gross b/c it clashes with our self-perception, it's felt as a threat. Being kind to ourselves—despite what feels natural—is the basis of recovery.
#cptsd

It feels so insincere at first, and really for quite a while, but just keep catching yourself and trying to be kind to you...as you would a baby or kitten or puppy. Insert your favorite being...

It WILL make a difference. Your future self will thank you.

Many abuse survivors think repeating “I’m not a piece of shit” is positive self-talk. I did.

Saying “I love & care for myself” can feel awkward & gross b/c it clashes with our self-perception, it's felt as a threat. Being kind to ourselves—despite what feels natural—is the basis of recovery.
#cptsd

Getting out of our minds and back into our bodies is where healing happens!

"Social media is an accessible form of support for many people who experience complex trauma and dissociation, with a variety of platforms available." View support sheet, Wise Social Media Use for Survivors of Complex Trauma and Dissociation: https://ow.ly/Q7En50YplOA #DIDAwarenessDay

Catching all our subtle self-hate talk can be such a challenge, it can feel so "justified" that its almost invisible, but still impacts our energy & motivation. Hope a new perspective can help with the process. ❤️‍🩹

"You can do it," isn't self-talk many CPTSD survivors use. But don't think we lack motivation - it's quite the opposite.

"You must prove you’re not useless." "You’re behind." "You don’t deserve to rest." "Do better.”

This is not inspiration, it’s survival programming. And it ain't sustainable.

Heard! Often I try to check in with my values, to make sure I take action in alignment with what I value, not what I feel I "must" do.

Its like we trade a little piece of our soul each time we summon "motivational" self-hate-talk. It may work for a time, but at a great great cost.

"You can do it," isn't self-talk many CPTSD survivors use. But don't think we lack motivation - it's quite the opposite.

"You must prove you’re not useless." "You’re behind." "You don’t deserve to rest." "Do better.”

This is not inspiration, it’s survival programming. And it ain't sustainable.

Wish I could yell this from the mountain tops:

Survivors don't need to be "pushed" more, we need to be shown - perhaps for the first time in our lives - we're loved no matter our faults or failures.

Threats and "tough love" echo past abuse; we need compassionate presence – not pressure.
#cptsd

Just seeing how other people structure their recovery is helpful - you made me reflect on what I was doing and think it through a little more. ❤️‍🩹🙏💪

Enjoyed the clarity of your morning routine! Most days, outside of work stuff, I first explore a recovery intention by reading & note taking and then writing or revising. My days generally go better when I put in some work clarifying my thoughts on healing. Thanks for sharing!

Wish I could yell this from the mountain tops:

Survivors don't need to be "pushed" more, we need to be shown - perhaps for the first time in our lives - we're loved no matter our faults or failures.

Threats and "tough love" echo past abuse; we need compassionate presence – not pressure.
#cptsd

Anger "should have been back then" - yes, I like this point. So much of healing is just acknowledging this, I see now. There's definitely an important difference between venting and processing/unburdening, even though both may have elements of "expressing anger."

A meta-analytic review of anger management activities that increase or decrease arousal: What fuels or douses rage? Anger is an unpleasant emotion that most people want to get rid of. Some anger management activities focus on decreasing arousal (e.g., deep breathing…

Some good discussion on defining anger and theory in original meta-analysis.

www.sciencedirect.com/science/arti...

Venting Doesn't Reduce Anger, But Something Else Does, Review Finds Venting when angry seems sensible.

"Venting anger might sound like a good idea, but there's not a shred of scientific evidence to support catharsis theory."

Not surprising to me. Review notes difference between reflection & rumination, validation & raging, however.

www.sciencealert.com/venting-does...