Miss Heidy

Assuming this is rhetorical

Comic. [Person with microphone in front of three people standing behind their own desks with drawers and a round box on top. The boxes of the first and last are shaking with their lids slightly raised.] PERSON WITH MIC: And now, for the final round, you have each been given a skunk with a hangover and chewing gum stuck to its fur. You have 30 minutes. Good luck. [caption] The Home Remedy World Championships

Home Remedies

xkcd.com/3217/

Your tile guy? Oooohhhh, I hope you had a little strut in your step after that. As craftspeople, those guys know, and appreciate, High Quality!

Happy Birthday Mr Adams! I'm a big fan of one of your characters. Agrajag( esp. his short life as a potted petunia who is reincarnated improbably high in the sky before dying by falling into a whale) speaks to me on such a deep level, I made him my avatar. Oh, no! Not again! indeed

😎

I've been on salary for the last 5 yrs. I've also spent the last 5 Februaries still stressing about rent. See, I spent like 25 yrs as a server living off tips, and in Feb., you're 3 shifts short, and the panic is real. The psychological damage is permanent.

Whoever decided that a member of CO Rockies! management should be w/in 50 km of an international baseball game should be taken behind the bleachers and shown what a properly wielded baseball bat can do

As it should be

This Year Without Winter has been awful. Almost every industry in CO is hurting, because we're all downstream of the tourism industry

Yeah, that wasn't one of Vin Diesel's better movies. Editing and continuity checks are important!

Good. Shocking and upsetting news, like, idk, just for example, the Rox losing, should be reported asap. Wouldn't want those wondering to keep having hope any longer than needed

There's a raptor/falcon/hawk fella that has overlapping territory with the nesting trees of a tiny black songbird flock. The spring harassment is AMAZING! These itty-bitty birds just dive-bombing the shit outta the big guy, who tries to be cool but eventually grumbles away with ruffled feathers

I'm not familiar with yucca flux, but that second sentence should be part of a warning label on every bottle of MadDog 20/20

Just surrender to the drawstring while you're young and can still enjoy life. Even 1 more kind of jean isn't worth it

there's so much bad in the world but there's also people who lift up and carry an elderly bat around every day so he can pretend he's flying again, and that's the part of the world I think is worth fighting for

We are not at war with Iran, although we have been for the last 50 years.

BREAKING: Donald Trump has reportedly approved an unlimited budget for Kash Patel to attend sporting events and taxi his girlfriend and all her friends so the FBI will be distracted and a successful domestic Iranian terror attack can be used as a pretext to take emergency powers.

Hey, right now, try to remember: Are you currently winning or losing The Game?

I looked out the window of the train just now and thought, what disgusting weather...it's cold and the snow is coming down sideways. And then I giggled. WE FINALLY GOT SNOW! AND IT'S THE GOOD KIND, WITH LOTS OF WATER!!! HURRAY!

Well, gas is expensive, and food is expensive, and we’re doing a war nobody wants, but at least there are no jobs

We're very excited! I'm sure you're less than thrilled, but I'm twirling around and singing like Julie Andrews in the Alps

You're here for our first snowfall in two months. Congrats!

it's insane that my country's current position is that, if we don't like the leader of a sovereign nation, not only do we get to kill them we get to pick their successor

I don't drink recreationally, and I'm a *sigh* Rockies fan, but otherwise, same

FT comments section this morning - saying what everyone else is thinking, right?

I live near NORAD and about 6 other military installations. "You're gonna die from nuclear fallout" has been drilled into me since the first grade.

Started taking kanna again (because it's in my new joint supplement) and I forgot that kanna bundles up all your stress and anxiety and Pushes it off to some random digit. My left foot can't stop moving and shaking, but the rest of me is just happily ignoring it. That's all Left Foot's problem now

Oh, it took 3 months of ownership, but I found out my cd player has a radio too! Amazing what happens when you put your glasses on

The cool alternative rock station I listened to in the 90s is, somehow, still playing 90s alternative rock. Even when the band is brand-new, w/members who weren't even Born in the 90s, they're making 90s alternative rock. It's weird.