Calibrated Dark

Your daddy needs you rn, cozy Peso.

Welp. Okay then. Game over. Their intentions/trajectory were no secret to anyone, but I suppose there was a correlation between just how deep their connections went with how far the knife was buried in my chest. I'm aware of how stupid it was of me to hope they'd behave any different. Bummer.

Got my vote.

Hunkle Beefy. X) 🤌✨

Whoah! Were you the only employee in history that knew what was in the mystery drawers?

"Can I help you find something?"
"Couple pots and all your ferric chloride."
"..."
"I know where they should be".
"Oh o-okay (should I call the police?)"

Neuroscience is equal parts fascinating and scary at times. Still remember exactly where I was standing as a child when it clicked, every person lives a reality just as vivid and real as my own, and frustrated that I couldn't see into their heads. XD Still gotta watch the last video you shared.

Alkaline batteries have that ~mouthfeel~

I've got this weird feeling mine is gonna malfunction. Y'know, like body cams. That's just my luck. It's can be disappointing. Technology is very complicated and often doesn't work as advertised. Many firmware updates designed to fix problems tend to break things further, for example.

(Actual conversation, trying to explain brain zaps)
Me: Kinda like when you lick a 9V to see if it's dead, but in your face.
Wife: Why are you licking 9V batteries?
Me: To see if they're dead! Never lick a 9V?
Wife: No.
Me: You gotta try this.
Wife: No I don't!
Me: Don't make this difficult.

Ahhhhhhhhh! OMG! YES! XD
This was the perfect thing to wake up to. Precious cargo on its way up, top shelf!

Jenn: What are you to giddy about? OOOHH!!!

💚

Don't you go givin' me silly ideas now! I've got less than 3 weeks to finish a project! DX

Hahah, thanks!! These just keep getting better! XD

Is... I want this. Fuck IT, this is the life I want.

Wow! Sigh. I could only dream of being that impossibly boss. 😭 I'd need to take the supplemental X-games training for that.

Reminds me of the days I'd scate around the print shop on a pallet jack. That place was very "OSHA what? Some kind of salad? An STD? Sounds made up".

Ladies, gentlemen, any curious large game, I have an announcement to make. As-of last night, I'm officially forklift certified.

I understand the urges to drop heavy loads, but I'm dedicated to my loving wife and workplace safety, and humbly request maintaining balance in the gravity of this news.

Now I wonder if they'd let it slide if they were doinkin' missionary, cross on the wall, speech bubble "I love you, but not as much as Jesus, this is solely for the purpose of 500 babies"....Jizz everywhere. All over the curtains, arm chair covers, throw pillows and carpeting. :V

No but seriously, my immediate thought was OK! Time to create a character with both a digi AND plantigrade leg, give a whole tear-jerk backstory about being relentless teasing due to their "deformity", overcame adversity, the extra joint in their leg allows them to save like 500 babies, etc.

"The older I get, the more convinced I am that the space between people who are trying their best to understand each other is hallowed ground."

- Fred Rogers

You are seen. Feels like living in some kind of Rube Goldberg machine of stupidity that gets so unexpectedly ridiculous at certain points I can't help but laugh. I must remember to laugh or it'll destroy me at this point.

🎵 Will help you get yo-- *thump*

*Disgustipated starts at 6m45s*

Narrator: "He didn't stop that."

Making fart noises on their thigh!

I'll Turn You Into Poetry

Don’t get too close
I’ll turn you into poetry
Your veins will run with ink
Parchment for skin
Wrinkled and marked
Regret, smiles, memories
For thoughts

It's the Marge Simpson "I just think they're neat!" meme with her holding a butt. Just a small, independent butt, living its best life. (Yes, I may be implying that it's a sentient butt, butt there's no need to fear this diminutive sentient butt). THIS butt is not malicious and can't even move without assistance so, kind of a non-issue.

*snort* XD I don't know exactly where your line is and it's taking extreme self-control to remain a gentleman, butt, my religion strictly forbids machine incubation of eggs, I'll need to be smothered by plump caring buttocks.

Can't pass up a dick/butt/fart joke! It's a sickness! I'm sorry!

Deal! :D

"Now before you do anything stupid" I literally just said to myself while doodling a butt into a meme template for a BSky reply.

(In my defense, always make sure you're working on the right layer!)

#GraphicsDesignIsMyPassion

Jericho the horse from Bobs Burgers, as seen in season 6 episode 17, lookin' dapper as fuuuuu

Jericho the horse from Bobs Burgers, as seen in season 6 episode 17, lookin' dapper as fuuuuu... in jorts.

Okay. *steeples fingers*
Jericho yes or no.
And "Before You Say No, Consider Jorts-Jericho!" ™

(I feel a deep need for force at least this one episode upon you. Quid pro quo, you can make me do something too, it's only fair).

#Jericho #Horse #HotHorse #StopBeingHot #StopThat #BoigasDeLaRoberto

Aw man, bummer. :<
Want me to fax ya some chunky soup or somethin'?

(I'm still upset we never got a 5.25" food drive. Young starry-eyed Rick had dreams of pirating rotisserie chicken. Didn't even get the KFConsole ffs!)

Ooooh my, Jurassic Park's about to head in a REALLY weird direction! 👀🤏🍿

My cousin has been fighting that same issue, did a few experiments and discovered that LOWERING his years of experience, nothing else, resulted in more bites. Repeatable. Thinking likely being "he'll want too much money, skip". Being 2" taller on dating sites produced very similar anomalies. 🤔