"Oh," said Rincewind.
"You understand?" said Ponder.
"No. I was just hoping that if I didn’t say anything you’d stop trying to explain things to me."
𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑳𝒂𝒔𝒕 𝑯𝒆𝒓𝒐
I must confess the the activities of the UK governments for the past couple of years have been watched with frank admiration and amazement by Lord Vetinari. Outright theft as a policy had never occured to him.
Sir Terry Pratchett
The wizards from Unseen University, being perhaps the intellectual cream or certainly the cerebral yogurt of their generation, passed through this stage in minutes.
The Last Continent
The days followed one another patiently. Right back at the beginning of the multiverse they had tried all passing at the same time, and it hadn't worked.
Wyrd Sisters
THIS IS MOST IRREGULAR, said Death.
"We're sorry. It's not our fault."
HOW MANY OF YOU ARE THERE?
"More than 1300, I'm afraid."
VERY WELL, THEN. PLEASE FORM AN ORDERLY QUEUE.
𝑷𝒚𝒓𝒂𝒎𝒊𝒅𝒔
"We are vampires. We cannot help what we are."
"Only animals can’t help what they are," said Granny.
𝘊𝘢𝘳𝘱𝘦 𝘑𝘶𝘨𝘶𝘭𝘶𝘮
"Are you all right, O jeweled master of the sun?" one of them ventured.
"No, I'm not," snapped the king, who was having some of his basic assumptions about the universe severely rattled, and that never puts anyone in a good mood.
𝓟𝔂𝓻𝓪𝓶𝓲𝓭𝓼
"Well, I just...I thought...well, I just thought you’d be teaching me more, that’s all."
"I’m teaching you things all the time," said Lu-Tze. "You might not be learning them, of course."
𝓣𝓱𝓲𝓮𝓯 𝓸𝓯 𝓣𝓲𝓶𝓮
Granny slapped her hands together like the crack of doom. "Right! Let's do some good!" she said, to the universe at large.
𝘔𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘦
And this was diplomacy, too, he thought, when you let your mouth chatter away while you watched people’s eyes. It’s just like being a copper.
𝑻𝒉𝒆 𝑭𝒊𝒇𝒕𝒉 𝑬𝒍𝒆𝒑𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒕
It's tangled, but it ain't twisted.
𝘔𝘢𝘴𝘬𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘦
Ridcully’s eyes twinkled behind the smoke and, not for the first time, Ponder suspected that the man was sometimes rather cleverer than he appeared. It would not be hard.
𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝐿𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝒞𝑜𝓃𝓉𝒾𝓃𝑒𝓃𝓉
"When you really need them the most," he said, "million-to-one chances always crop up. Well-known fact."
𝑮𝒖𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒔! 𝑮𝒖𝒂𝒓𝒅𝒔!
People healed, books didn't.
𝑭𝒆𝒆𝒕 𝒐𝒇 𝑪𝒍𝒂𝒚
An immortal has a great deal to remember. Sometimes it’s better to put things where they will be safe.
𝒯𝒽𝒾𝑒𝒻 𝑜𝒻 𝒯𝒾𝓂𝑒
The Watch was back and out there on the streets, and if they weren't actually as good as Detritus at kicking arse they were definitely prodding buttock.
𝘍𝘦𝘦𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘊𝘭𝘢𝘺
"Well, when I was a lad," said Truckle, "if you wanted to get a girl’s int’rest, you had to cut off your worst enemy’s wossname and present it to her."
"Whut"
"I SAID YOU HAD TO CUT OFF YOUR WORST ENEMY’S WOSSNAME AND PRESENT IT TO HER!"
𝒯𝒽𝑒 𝐿𝒶𝓈𝓉 𝐻𝑒𝓇𝑜
"I've never seen Death actually at work."
"Not many have," said Albert. "Not twice, at any rate."
𝓜𝓸𝓻𝓽
"But you hate godmothers, Mistress Weatherwax," said Mrs. Gogol.
"We're the other kind," said Granny. "We're the kind that gives people what they know they really need, not what we think they ought to want."
𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘈𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘥
"If you're going to suggest I try dropping twenty feet down a pitch dark tower in the hope of hitting a couple of greasy little steps which might not even still be there, you can forget it," said Rincewind sharply.
The Light Fantastic
Rincewind stared at the badge. He’d never had one before. Well, that was technically a lie...he’d had one that said ‘Hello, I Am 5 Today!’, which was just about the worst possible present to get when you are six.
𝓣𝓱𝓮 𝓛𝓪𝓼𝓽 𝓗𝓮𝓻𝓸
Racism was not a problem on the Discworld, because—what with trolls and dwarfs and so on—speciesism was more interesting. Black and white lived in perfect harmony and ganged up on green.
𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴 𝘈𝘣𝘳𝘰𝘢𝘥
This was music that had not only escaped but had robbed a bank on the way out. It was music with its sleeves rolled up and its top button undone, raising its hat and grinning and stealing the silver.
𝘚𝘰𝘶𝘭 𝘔𝘶𝘴𝘪𝘤
There was a respectful silence, as there always is when large sums of money have just passed away.
𝘚𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘺
"Quick, you must come with me," she said. "You're in great danger!"
"Why?"
"Because I will kill you if you don't."
𝘚𝘰𝘶𝘳𝘤𝘦𝘳𝘺
And then everyone was just running, because everyone else was running.
𝒥𝒾𝓃𝑔𝑜
"I suppose there's not some kind of magic you don't know about?" "If there is, we don't know about it."
𝓡𝓮𝓪𝓹𝓮𝓻 𝓜𝓪𝓷
It occurred to him, not for the first time, that far too many people put their trust in iron and steel when gold made some of the best possible weapons.
𝘚𝘰𝘶𝘭 𝘔𝘶𝘴𝘪𝘤
Thank you for coming to see me. Don't hesitate to leave.
Guards! Guards!
It's a metaphor of human bloody existence, a dragon. And if that wasn't bad enough, it's also a bloody great hot flying thing.
Guards! Guards!
