Sam

Ohhhhh we've got this notion
That we'd quite like to sail the ocean
So we're building a big boat and building it stat
But there's three of us only
And we don't want to be lonely
So please download Blender and make us a rat

"why did you become a writer" because no one gave a shit about my special interests growing up. now i make them everyone else's problem. next question

World Book Day Tip: if your kid convinces 14 friends to pool their WBD tokens they can preorder a copy of the new Ben Lerner

Bump! Thump! Thump! Bump!
Down the wall in the hall.

Your abiding love for Bruce Hornsby is one of my favourite things about you, Stereogum

'new hen houses available, representation of hen house in use drawn by hungry fox'

I've accidentally become the protagonist in a shit 'hero's journey' fantasy novel

A sign that says 'EDEN ➡️'

MY TIME HAS COME

Your WHAT project?? 🙏

The Bilbao Guggenheim:

❌ 15 hour train from London
❌ pretty but impractical
❌ often has Jeff Koons in it

The Thames Barrier:

✅ like 10 minutes on the DLR
✅ saves us all from drowning on the regular
✅ NO JEFF KOONS

Me: yeah I'm into vinyl

The vinyl:

PUNCH: Punch Odell Octopus Jellycat. Practical Punch mother substitute.
RESEARCHER: No, Punch. You can’t have a Jellycat.
PUNCH: Good Jellycat good Punch give beautiful Punch deserve monkey
RESEARCHER: Punch, we simply can’t afford a Jellycat. It is an unjustifiable expense
PUNCH: jealousy professor

Chatting to a normal hill ski jumper: 'no babe yours is perfect haha, the big ones scare me'

Alright Johnny Cash