chaos robot 🤖

This site about to see an uptick with the Cloudflare outage crippling the bird app today 😅

I bet doom scroll meant something way cooler in the middle ages.

The Valentines Day holy trinity 💝💓💖

QQ for folks still on TikTok after The Great 12 Hour Blackout since I’m curious — did yall have to acknowledge or accept new TOS or anything since then, or was it just back on business as usual?

Literally nobody is touching Stove Top stuffing for me, it has no peers!!

the whole gulf of america thing feels too much like the freedom fries thing so at least we’ll get some memes and jokes for a few years out of it before people start saying how dumb it was

let me take a moment to celebrate the maybe less appreciated but tremendously delicious ponzu sauce 👏🏽😋🤤

In the last 4 years or so I reconnected with one of those boys bc we worked at the same place and while we're no longer colleagues, it's been really nice to still chat occasionally since our kids are similar ages. He even knitted blankets for my daughters when they were born and send them to me!

the feminine urge to burn everything to the ground and start over in a spooky coastal town with a horrifying backstory.

I only know of one person who is a product of "birth tourism" and to your point her family was extremely wealthy and influential in Nigerian politics. Your average person is not doing this lol

We finally(!!!) started season 2 of House of the Dragon and my husband was like “a little child murder to make up for the lack of boobs in the premiere, we are SO back!!” 😂

My absolute favorite part of a post-snow morning 

My sister and one other cousin are the only lefties in our family. She married a leftie and now my niece is a lefty too lol

The baby has been favoring her left hand recently for grabbing so I told my sister - one of the few lefties in our family - she may have some company on the same side of the table at family meals so elbows don’t bump 😂

It’s awful and I feel terrible, but thank god 3 seconds later she’s already moved on 😂

So yeah, babies have alligator brain and thank goodness for that or else I’d feel like shit about having to do these lip/tongue stretches bc of how much she hates them 😅

Very sweet right? Yes, but only for the first group of babies the adult brings over, because by the time she returns back for the others, she’s forgotten they are HER babies and eats them thinking they are interlopers 🥲

Alligator brain” is the quickness in which babies forget things and shift emotions. I call it that because when I was on a fan boat tour in NOLA, the guide told us about how gators are extremely territorial in the swamp, so when they have babies, they move them to a safer area

I’ve been explaining what I like to call “alligator brain” in babies to other people and it’s hilarious bc folks never realized that alligators are kinda dumb.

She was a month earlier than Jack with this, I was unprepared lol

Yeah I mean it’s not recommended, but there also isn’t a ton of studies about it so I just stopped using the night cream when I found out I was pregnant. I’m glad to be back now though lol

As a short person who had c sections, I couldn’t have survived the early months if I did that 😂😭

Now that I’m done breastfeeding, I’m ready to welcome my Lord and Savior retinol back into my life 🙏🏽🛐

The baby decided to both start crawling and push herself from belly to seated position on the same day, so now I gotta lower the crib mattress 😅

yeah starting solids was the reason why i decided to get the release - she handles purees fine but was gagging a ton on other solids and it was stressing me out. she had a class 2 posterior tie, so hopefully this will help!

oh noooo!!! Jack's dentist said recently that his partially reattached, but since he's 5 and has no speech/breathing/eating issues I think I might just leave it be unless he wants to get it done when he's older 😅

we got the baby’s tongue tie released yesterday and she haaaaaates the stretches we have to do like 6x a day, so it’s gonna be a rough 3 weeks around here 😅🥴

heartwarming: the worst people you know are fighting

As much as I like putting my home back to baseline, it’s always kinda sad to pack up the holiday decorations at the beginning of a new year

After using this to season the lamb chops I made on Christmas Ave, this is now an herbes de provence stan account!!!