More good days than bad ones is definitely the direction we want to be headed, right! I am happy to hear it, good sir.
I hear ya - it’s hard to get used to. It’s like my mind is trained to think about the worst happening.
Love this sweater!
@hairytallboy.bsky.social I hope you are keeping well? I've definitely missed keeping up with ya.
I am just being sure that I am not giving up myself in order to fit what he wants. While I believe in compromise, if someone wants me, they will need to want me for who I am ... not what they want to make me into.
I've worked too hard on myself to fall back into old patterns. ❤️
Yeah - I think I've had a few folks worried. 🥴 I had to take a much needed break from the internet to get myself situated without distraction.
The update regarding the fella ... we are still very much in touch - regularly. Although I didn't want to get serious, I am open to seeing where it goes.
23 Days Later
I have risen from the abyss.
👀
I am starting to have my doubts, 😂
I’ve endured far more than I’ve ever imagined I could, or would.
It is 😂
He messaged to say he would be home from work within the hour and would like for me to join him when he goes to the store. I had to politely decline. lol.
Honestly, I am absolutely drained of energy today. I feel like I’ve been hit by a train. I’ve barely walked around the apartment today, never mind leave it.
Update: Day 6
This man got a sex drive that is unlike anything I’ve ever witnessed.
He likes “lots of sex and long sex, not short sex”. He says, “please baby, give me your hole” with that accent. Powerless.
He likes sex to last for hours people!!! HOURS!!
By body needs a two-week vacation.
😴 🥵
It is wild, it is good, it is just what I've needed. I surprised myself by agreeing to come stay with him for a few days and I am happy I did. No regrets!
To say that it has provided me with a mental reset would be an understatement.
3/3
Anyway ... thank you for coming to the latest edition of Andrew's Diary.
2/3
My body aches. AND, he is trying to fatten me up. Like, my dude - stop putting me through these workouts and let the calories stay put.
He was getting ready for work this morning, I opened my eyes and he noticed within 30 seconds. I didn't have a chance to prepare - mentally or physically. 🤪
1/3
Update: Day 5 - yes, still here. 😂
It's Thursday. I am going 'home' on Saturday. 2 more nights with this man - who talks A LOT and it's often worse than my ADHD stories. BUT, that voice and that accent, it's just 🤤🥵
Also, he told me he doesn't like "short sex". When I say I am sore ...
I am going home, though - the U-haul has not been packed 😂. But I am enjoying my free time while I have it.
It feels nice to do something out of my comfort zone.
Update: Day 3
I am still here. Hostage by choice.😂
This guy is such a nice guy as far as I can tell. We were snowed in due to a storm yesterday. He taught me to cook more Ukrainian dishes.
I shovelled us out this morning so he could get to work. Was paid last night. 😜
It’s been fun to hang out.
Update: Day 2
When he got home from work, we cooked some Ukrainian dishes. We had a drink and a delicious meal.
I got very light-headed, soaked in sweat, and almost passed out while trying to get air. Embarrassing.
He took good care of me.
I woke up alive today.
Uh oh. My playlist is running through and it has hit a Joni song, 😂. Talk about timing!!
One thing left to do I suppose …
I am resisting! 😂 😉
These Alanis lyrics feel somewhat relevant today:
“Shouldn't be here
Would you forgive me love
If I danced in your shower
Would you forgive me love
If I laid in your bed
Would you forgive me love
If I stay all afternoon oh..”
I’ve bathed in his tub, napped in his bed. This feels inappropriate 😂 😆 😝
This is very out of character for me, 😂. I am very surprised by my own actions. Like, VERY surprised.
But something was telling me that I just have to do something wild for once. I’m 38 and this is definitely the wildest thing I’ve done.
I just want to say … if I don’t make it out of here - it was worth it!
xoxo - impulsive slut (apparently)
He is Ukrainian born. Family is in Israel. He speaks multiple languages and sounds like he could disappear me, and tear this ass up prior to doing so.
Things have already occurred that I have not ever experienced before. 🥵
My judgement has been compromised by the accent and the D.
Update: We went from my ‘cottage’ to his ‘cottage’. Conversations were had. It got late. We slept for one hour. Hit the highway. Got to his place long enough for him to let me in and he is gone to work. 🤷🏻♂️
I am not sure what I was thinking. But he’s hot. And seems nice. 😂… and, I need to let loose.
Folks, I am about to have a "I'm coming to the cottage moment."
I have been talking to this very attractive gentleman. I know he speaks Russian but was cooking a Ukrainian dish for supper. He invited me over. I couldn't go to him. He is now driving 2 hours to meet me.
HE IS COMING TO THE COTTAGE.
Throwback to 2010. I think it might have been Christmas Eve, 🤣. I was trying to convince an old friend of mine to come wish me a Merry Christmas. (It worked)
Also, before I crawl into my bed and sexually objectify myself ... if you follow me and you have something anti-trans in your profile, it's an instant block.
Everyone is entitled to be attracted to whomever they're attracted to, we all have types. You don't have to be an asshole about it.
I'm just going to admit to it ... I had a drink. Followed by some shots of Fireball.
Fireball really is my weakness. I'm not mad about it.
If you were here, I promise you wouldn't be mad about it either.
Goodnight. xx
(Also, what a friggin' day, right?!)
Love you all xx
I watched the first two earlier this week. This post just reminded me I need to get started on The Return of the King.
C'mere for a cuddle. I got popcorn. Just sayin'.
Sending you all of the love. Sometimes disconnecting is exactly what is needed. Be sure to take good care of yourself. I often find myself in a difficult head space and need to take some time for me. Wishing you all the best. xx
