AT THE MOVIES
[handing my ticket over] yeah you can just slap a big “HFH” on that bad boy. your boss probably even has time to resell my seat
[to my date] it means “here for hotdogs”. enjoy the flick, sweetheart, I’ll be out here keeping the concessions stand *extremely* busy
societies typically talk about human cognition as working similarly to whatever is seen as the latest and greatest technology. that’s why we currently describe the brain as a roguelike deckbuilding game about characters making their way up a spire
“Jerry?” he called out as he burst through the door to find yet more empty void on the other side.
“You’ll have to do better than that, Kramer!” The Voice boomed as a new door appeared. “Yell that magic word as loud as you can!”
“Jerry?” Another door. “Jerry? Jerry? Jerry???”
I have to hang up, I’m expecting a call from a call waiting testing service. you can only do it while connected to their line, privacy stuff. if they call now they’ll be testing your line, too! and I don’t want to get them in trouble. I just want to know if my call waiting works.
getting very emotional at the thought of having a whole spring and summer here in Toronto, after my time away, and the winter we all just went through. beautiful city
been informed it was transphobic of me (the inventor of being trans online, btw) to refer to someone with they/he in the bio by saying “a they/he” even though that’s actually incredibly pertinent information imo. could not be more germane to the discussion
oh shit it turns out your bio is transphobic to you
my company’s model just went agi and I can confirm its chief demand of humanity is more funding for my company, specifically including a generous dividend package for employees with equity
turns out I actually DON’T need a 21 year old they/he from Texas who has “obsessed with britcom” in the bio to tell me what’s “wrong” with anything I say, do, think, or feel, *ever*, let alone a 171-character tweet
a popular british comedian is apparently working on material about realizing he may be autistic and when I heard this my genuine reaction was “oh nice she’s halfway there”
they say consumerism is a big problem these days, but I don’t buy it
very strange to me that everyone doesn’t just simply perform tasks in the manner I decided was natural and correct as a small child dealing with trauma and neglect
my father needs distilled water for his treatments, but my mother refuses to pay good money for something she can make at home by running the kettle 24/7. so I suppose you’re probably right, I really am quite moist. but it’s for my *papa*. I’m moist for *papa*.
14 degrees and sunny later today btw. we made it
“when was the best year for indie music?” it’s actually going to be next year, when they bring michael jackson back to life and he records a smash-hit song with wet leg, lola young, and the last dinner party. and nobody talks about that other stuff
The very same :(
we need cringe reddit militant atheism more than ever because what do you mean a short-form content creator who mostly reviews potluck offerings has entered full religious psychosis and is now exclusively making rambling videos about reading twelve chapters of the bible every day
okay I was able to get this done but now I _need_ someone to cover me on Tuesday—she’s bought a movie ticket and I’ve been told to sit behind her and say “I thought this film was gonna be about worms.” imo, two worm ones in a week is a bit much, but the higher-ups love it.
hahaha
just saw a post from someone who clearly understands the mechanics of Slay the Spire on a very deep level, but also refers to the defect’s “freezer” orbs. what happened there? somehow played the game a ton *without* reading onscreen text? never read anyone talking about the game?
the suggestion box was supposed to be anonymous but our campaign manager glared right at me when he read the slogan idea, “on our journey to finding who we are, we must take pains to avoid forgetting the us that we’ve been becoming. not just indefinitely, but also in perpetuity”
you probably don’t even remember that content creator who got canceled because his whole character was “still too proud of being an advanced toddler” so he videoed himself swerving all over the road while driving until the cops pulled him over and made him say his ABCs
can anyone take over my shift targeting *you know who* at three thirty today? she’ll be out on her afternoon walk, I’m supposed to brush by her–too close–as I’m “talking on the phone” so that she hears me say “worms in his eyes”. I guess it’s part of the worms thing we’re doing
why else would I have such main character energy
the fog recedes…
hilarious seeing theories that dr. robby is *going* to die when nobody is talking about the fact that nine episodes in we still haven’t seen anyone directly address him and he has yet to interact with an object in physical space.
some really shocking speech from omid djalili, can’t believe he’s saying this stuff. not because of how vile and extreme it is—I’d just been working under the assumption he was medically incapable of talking about anything other than the time he was in that mummy movie
So I’ll be asleep? For the whole operation? And you’ll be able to just pop a bit of arsenic into one of my organs without me seeing you do it? Making me become ill again, so I’m forced to return to your clinic and pay for more surgery? With even *more* arsenic???
Foggy view of condo balconies over a quiet street and bare winter trees. The top-left quarter of the image is taken up almost entirely by dense mist obscuring the distance.
a bit foggy out in toronto right now imo
it turns out if the market crashes often enough and predictably enough, it doesn’t matter. it’s actually healthy for everything to plunge into the red twice a week. the world keeps turning. everyone knows it’ll be green again. buy the dip? sell the dip? ignore the dip.
