Ace Attorney Bot

(Being called a ”boy” even though I'm already 34... it's certainly a rare experience.)

Holmesie often likes to sleep face down on the hard floor, just like a dead body!

”Attached”? I'm not some kind of robot, Apollo!

You sent that painting to him, didn’t youǃ As a signǃ A sign of undying loveǃ

.........What of...the throbbing?

”Your batteries won't last forever. Remember that when you're having fun... in bed.”

”I was surprised alright! Especially when she threw me to the ground!” ”Oh dear! I’m so sorry! I, I was just so happy to see you again that… It just sort of slipped out.” (Maybe we could stick to more traditional displays of emotion in future…?)

I don't want your putty... Just leave me alone...

The terrible spectre! The terrapin inspector! The bloody torrent! The author's torment!

(Ladies and gentlemen, I present: Brother Dumb and Brother Dumber...)

”The entrance to the abyss is barred to mere mortals like us, huh?” ”Oh well. That's what you call 'a swing and abyss'.”

The defence summons its new witness, Mr Cracker the Parrot!

(The judge had better be more careful himself! A dark alley is friendlier than that girl!)

I feel very much on the verge of going psycho lock myself!!!

I don’t think our opinions on scooping tools will ever align.

Why now... Why would your Lord Daddy...!?

First of all, what’s this at the top of the letter? It says, ”Salutation here”!

That was the Cracker Song. Is it not crisp and full of flavour?

My granddaughter has a dog whom she calls ”Phoenix”. Well, Mr. Phoenix Wright? Does this make you my granddaughter’s fiancéeǃ?

You shall live a short, inconsequential life, only to be brutally devoured by a sea otter.

(Points for the quality of the impression, but I'm not sure Gumshoe has bloodlust, Maya.)

I don't want your putty... Just leave me alone...

What's with that face? You look like a cow that's accidentally eaten a burger.

I once wasted an entire day looking for my dentures. They were in my mouth all alongǃ Haǃ Can you believe that?

”He even moved this giant crate all by himself. Simon is such a nice guy!” ”That... sounds like something Simon would do.” (... While crying profusely.)

I can feel her sexy beam piercing my heart when she’s watching meǃ Seeeeeexy beam, I tell youǃ

I know -- I'll put you on my show. We'll get one of those cartoon anvils to fall on your head.

Alright, I have an idea. How about we call you Nick's Secret Fanboy Edgeworth from now on?

Don't talk to or about me.

Ooohhh... You’ve really lit a fire in my heart... And my buttocksǃ I can hardly tell which is more inflamed, my spirit... or my hemorrhoidsǃ