michelle weber

ooh, what are those jeans?

but also the modified "butt-ass naked" form is 100% correct

If they had the capacity to do this, it would be really bad. And they probably will try to do a couple of high profile examples to make you think they *do* have the capacity. But like a lot of stuff, this is a memo designed to get you to voluntarily stop doing stuff they don’t like.

italy has so many wonderful foods, but poblanos are sadly not among them

my kingdom for some rajas

free idea: an astrology column called "the schmaltz in our stars," you're welcome

WeTransfer just changed their TOS giving themselves permission to train AI on any content you transfer and produce derivative works based on content you transfer that they are allowed to monetize and you are not allowed payment for.

Stop using WeTransfer.

WHY NOT BOTH

Brownshirt ICE rolled up to my local Home Depot today and got the F-off treatment.

Shoutout to this woman because this is exactly how it’s done. No badge, face covered = F*ck all the way off.

📌 It’s on us citizens to stand up for our vulnerable brothers and sisters.

i know, because i am a policeWOman

Reminder that I’m happy to help you move your Substack newsletter to a self-hosted Ghost newsletter that you fully own and control (and that scales more cheaply than Substack if you’re monetized.)

Molly Shah directed Waterworld.

#arte #artists #drawing #italia #sonosemprestanca

a drawing of a wall with a window with green shutters. in front of the wall are four street signs reading "il tuo letto" (your bed), "'na bella camomilla" (a nice camomile), "i tuoi pigiama preferiti" (your favorite PJs), "tutti i libri che non hai letto" (all the books you haven't read), and "la gioventù" (youth). all the signs have arrows pointing the same way except "la gioventù."

no apologies for my choices / nessuna scusa per le mie scelte

“When it was time to write, and he took his pen in his hand, he never thought of consequences; he thought of style. I wonder why I ever bothered with sex, he thought; there’s nothing in this breathing world so gratifying as an artfully placed semicolon.”

– Hilary Mantel, A Place of Greater Safety

i do this with mascarpone

strawberry season is best season

I KNOW

i love getting to write a strongly worded letter, but I like opening my door to not find my doormat not covered in an actual pile of feces EVEN MORE

so hard to please me, it is

you're a right thinking person. do it. totally worth it. no regrets.

it's that or start wearing fascinators

may start communicating exclusively via haiku and william carlos williams parody as my late-40s IDGAF affectation

This Is Just To Say

They have elected
the pope
who does not like
MAGA

and who
Vance was probably
hoping
they would not

Not sorry,
he is Augustinian
part Black
and so woke

Cubs win! Cubs win!

100%

SCHISM JOKE IS BEST JOKE

my dog is waiting on pins and needles

I assume a swiss guard will be at the door any minute now

🧨

he has informed me that he would rule under the name "Bud I" in homage to the film that highlighted this significant loophole in clerical regulations

a shaggy, scruffy blond dog making the biggest, doofiest smiley face sits on a bright green couch, staring right at the camera and daring you to tell him he is not perfection

a note for the cardinal electors, his name is pasticciotto, he is located in rome a scant 3km from the vatican, and there is no rule saying a dog can't be pope

a colorful pen and ink drawing showing seven plumes of smoke: white, black, orange, purple, green, pink, and brown. they are labeled: (1) we have a pope!; (2) we don't have a pope!; (3) we don't want a pope!; (4) we have a schism!; (5) we have an antipope!; (6) we have a girl!; and (7) "shit!"

made an explainer for those unfamiliar with smoke-based conclave communication methods

A SHAGGY BLOND DOG WITH BANGS KINDA LIKE BRAD PITT IN "LEGENDS OF THE FALL" STARES INTO THE CAMERA MAKING A HAPPY, DOOFY FACE AND BEGGING YOU TO BOOP HIS SNOOT

BOOP IT OR LOSE IT