Victoria Duncan

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Welcome / sorry 😭

Caring about people doesn't only look one way. It doesn't only look like being social or giving a lot of weight to what people say (vs what can be observed about them).

This was one of many things my autism diagnosis helped me understand.

We laughed about lines like the one I quoted. I thought I was making my point, but they thought I was making theirs. How can people be centred in a conversation about data and processes? How can people be centred in a diagram you made by yourself?

I didn't see it that way. I designed processes for people. I focused on how they worked, what they needed, and I built something that would help.

It looked sterile and constrictive to my team. You can't make a process for our super special work!

I worked on a team with a lot of very warm, empathetic types. When they talked about caring about people, they meant people-facing activities - talking, socializing, being together - or giving weight to people in the moment, like changing work plans because someone said they didn't like them.

(things said while consulting)

"Of course I care about people," I say, puzzled. "Look - they're right there in my diagram. Where do you think this data comes from?"

Neurotypicals will watch a cognitive minority clawing their way towards health & happiness and complain it's wrecking their bell curve

"The solution to the problems in autism research is not just to 'science harder.' To the contrary. Autism researchers and professionals would do well to make peace with that fact that autistic people can’t be slotted into a taxonomic flow chart as if we’re a sub-species of the human race."

Yeah this is fair, I understand parents should help kids learn social rules & values! In the absence of actually helpful conversations along those lines, it was a lot of assumptions about why I was doing things (ex. "for attention") and a deep horror of embarrassment for any reason.

My autistic version of this was being called "embarrassing" as a kid, and blamed for the times I did something unexpected, and never told in detail what it was exactly or how to avoid it next time. Just accepting that you're hard to be around and will never understand why.

This is what the "decolonize research" advocates are trying to say!

I didn't read the interview because that much rage is bad for my health but from what I gather this is about trying to push autistic people back in the bogeyman box because we were more profitable when people were scared of us

"There is no scientific evidence autistic children benefit from ear defenders" is technically true if you don't count the child asking for the ear defenders as evidence

I needed to be reminded this is a thing social media can do 💜

We gotta help them out 😭

Reader: They seem to think I'm pretty good at it.

Every so often I have a little cackle about being an autistic consultant who works in communications and change management 👀

It's always "have you considered medicating your ADHD" and never "thank you for the mentally-stimulating sentence structure"

This one is too real. My parents are highly anxious, fully masking undiagnosed NDs and being around them sets my self-work back a decade 😭

Just so people on bluesky are aware…I was very early bluesky and I very much actively followed every dog account I could find that signed up and now when I open bluesky I basically am given pure dog content straight to the brain stream every time. I am proposing everyone else do this. The end.

I know, milk isn't actually health food, but looking back it was still nice to have it marketed to us so earnestly. Can't imagine what they'd do now.

"Everyone thinks they're autistic now" is just code for "I might accidentally treat an autistic person like a full fledged human, unacceptable", I will die on this hill

I mean sure but I have Legalese Autism and would happily watch the video as is 😭 a good tip in general though!

It costs zero dollars to put entertaining gifs in your messages to your ADHD coworkers so they have a fighting chance of remembering what you asked them to do. Follow me for more tips on herding the cats that are your ND coworkers 💜

I agree it has to be an age appropriate discussion, but I'm still not sure if parents should shy away from using the actual terms.

Just because I didn't understand small talk didn't mean I didn't know I was different. Tell your autistic kids what their deal is or they'll have no choice but to believe the schoolyard bullies

They also used to tell us to drink milk!

They made educational tv shows and commercials!

Remember when governments used to like people and want to help them??

It's terrible how healthy self esteem and a willingness to set boundaries disrupts an autistic person's life 😭 or rather everyone else's, apparently 😭😭