24.04.2025 10:53
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Check your MySpace IM for more details on the U.S. invasion of Greenland.
The Illinois Department of Public Health (IDPH) gets 60% of its annual operating budget from the federal government.
That's with bird flu and tuberculosis beginning to swirl all around us.
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Even while the leopards are eating their faces, the people who voted for the "Leopards Eating People's Faces Party" refuse to believe the leopards would do any such thing.
My favorite part of Jimmy Carter's funeral was the way Melania was holding one funeral program and wearing two others.
"Some of you didn't Google t-a-r-i-f-f and it shows."
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"The mass exodus from X has been called The Fall of the Broman Empire."
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"Can't wait for The Swedish Chef to be named Commissioner of the Food and Drug Administration."
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"The glide path from Citizens United to the Muskification of our government was almost exactly 14 years."
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"It's like Shawshank without the Redemption." —Jimmy Kimmel
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"Dr. Pepper, Dr. Oz . . . what's the difference?"
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"Trump has rolled a giant grenade into the middle of the nation’s capital and watched with mischievous glee to see who runs away and who throws themselves on it.” — Peter Baker, New York Times
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"Kakistocracy: Government by the least suitable or competent citizens of a state."
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"Cabinet positions yet to be filled: U.S. Department of French Fryer Relations and Interior Secretary of Grabbing Them By The YouKnowWhat."
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"A brain worm in every pot." ~RFK
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"We are three seconds away from the My Pillow Guy becoming Surgeon General."
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"He is not building a cabinet. He's filing up a junk drawer."
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