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Waikiki Wanda

@wanda

I was the first person on Bluesky to post β€œcrube” πŸͺ³

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05.05.2023
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Latest posts by Waikiki Wanda @wanda

I can tell by the sparkle in your eye, you've been enchanted by the subtle splendour of the bay leaf, which you weren't supposed to eat.

11.03.2026 17:39 πŸ‘ 72 πŸ” 10 πŸ’¬ 4 πŸ“Œ 0

Show me stunning drone footage of my friend Evan's house
Show me incredible skills like juggling I can teach my friend Evan
Recommend videos that explore Evan's way of life
Show me videos of Evan loading his all-weather tires in the trunk
Tell me about the civilizations that gave rise to Evan

11.03.2026 17:15 πŸ‘ 30 πŸ” 4 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

A Canticle for Beavis

11.03.2026 17:17 πŸ‘ 88 πŸ” 14 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 1

They're still sort of trying to do this with deodorant but it's getting lumped in generally with other fascist-coded "cult of the natural" stuff. Finally, us aluminum heads are getting validated.

11.03.2026 16:10 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Yeah I was going to say!

11.03.2026 16:08 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I also love the idea that if They ever imposed some sort of strict water rationing, everyone would be universally fine with it because we weren't washing our hair anymore. No other uses for the stuff!

11.03.2026 15:56 πŸ‘ 7 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

If my silk scarf was regenerating itself constantly that would probably also change the calculus

11.03.2026 15:38 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Is this supposed…to clean somehow? Do you rinse it out?

11.03.2026 15:37 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

No!! It was crazy!

11.03.2026 15:36 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

And you’re putting it on your pillow every night!

11.03.2026 15:35 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Oh my god I remember this article so, so clearly. Before it, the propaganda had been starting to work on me and I was like maybe I need to try this and then those pictures snapped me right out of it

11.03.2026 15:34 πŸ‘ 6 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I think a lot of people only need to do it once or twice a week! If it doesn’t feel greasy/itchy I’m sure it doesn’t smell.

11.03.2026 15:33 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Oh noooo that makes it much worse πŸ˜”πŸ˜”πŸ˜”

11.03.2026 15:31 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

If I am remembering correctly, this was supposed to cure dandruff entirely!

11.03.2026 15:20 πŸ‘ 2 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Nate I do have a fear that white dreads are going to come back as a trend sooner than we think.

11.03.2026 15:19 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

It's a really marvelous kind of mindset that shampoo is a more dangerous item to have in the house than multiple guns.

11.03.2026 15:18 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Oh my GOD. It's still happening!!

11.03.2026 15:17 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Ooh great point actually. It was a little proto-MAHA!

11.03.2026 15:13 πŸ‘ 4 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

I know that's right. SMOH (Shaking my oily head)

11.03.2026 15:13 πŸ‘ 13 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 2 πŸ“Œ 0

The messaging was, as I recall, something like "If you get through the 8-12 weeks where you smell disgusting and look like you dunked your head in a deep fryer, you can save up to $15 a month"

11.03.2026 15:12 πŸ‘ 39 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 7 πŸ“Œ 0

Remember that couple of years where there was a really big coordinated media push to stop washing your hair at all. What the hell was that about

11.03.2026 15:10 πŸ‘ 70 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 15 πŸ“Œ 0

Don't fucking walk away from me, I'm trying to build rapport.

11.03.2026 12:38 πŸ‘ 83 πŸ” 9 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 0

The random RTs on anything personal are truly unsettling

11.03.2026 13:22 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I like how every new time a study comes out the thrust of it is like β€œCoffee is even healthier than previously thought”

11.03.2026 09:57 πŸ‘ 7 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Yes!!!!!

11.03.2026 09:10 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

i've just composed a brand new piece, "putting a block of tofu in a tape deck". it's challenging to both listener and machine

10.03.2026 20:36 πŸ‘ 77 πŸ” 9 πŸ’¬ 3 πŸ“Œ 2

You fellas are too kind

10.03.2026 21:55 πŸ‘ 3 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

Every time!

10.03.2026 21:23 πŸ‘ 6 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0

Yes. I have to agree the future will depend on how events transpire

10.03.2026 20:06 πŸ‘ 1 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 0 πŸ“Œ 0

I am talking about the human man Frank Reich. NO ONE is allowed to screenshot me saying "I am a reich apologist"

10.03.2026 19:52 πŸ‘ 5 πŸ” 0 πŸ’¬ 1 πŸ“Œ 0