Emperor Norton

me and the other scheming viziers are wearing shoes gifted to us by the king that are way too big. we look ridiculous. the whole court is laughing at us behind our backs. honestly this is a pretty low point for us, the scheming viziers

BEETLE MOSES SQUID COMIC!

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

Pretty crazy how important the blockade of a trade route is right now

Pray for the sound designer and the long nightmare of song clearances they'll have to endure for this production

As a playwright I'm obligated to spend today walking around angrily muttering "my culture is NOT a costume" at the news that Tarantino is doing a play

I just keep coming back around to, "there is a reason that no previous president did this foolish thing and it was not because they were weak, woke cowards, but because they could read a cost-benefit analysis."

NBC News poll Voters hold negative views of Al. In fact, the only topics less popular in the survey were the Democratic Party and Iran.

Truly a perfect news alert

brigitte lin in republic era men's attire

why is brigitte lin in peking opera blues actually the hottest woman who has ever lived

"it's all good, baby, the cat is in the bag"
*cat is visibly and loudly clawing its way out of the bag* "Everything is under control"
*blood streaming down their arms from the scratching*
"I don't feel faint at all"
*cat is looking at their eyes with unspeakable hunger*

It's fun talking to my conservative family members about Iran & them insisting the war is almost over, "these fanatics will give up any day now," and them locking into a logic death loop when I go "well, if they are fanatics, why would they ever give up? When have fanatics ever said yeah, I'm good?"

in case you've never seen it, this is Roger Ebert on The Mummy

ME: in summation, it is clear to all people of good taste and discernment that while Jimmy Jr. may be the one who dances it is in fact Zeke who is the true funky white boy

THESIS REVIEW PANEL: sir we are in the middle of a thesis defense, please leave

there's so much bad in the world but there's also people who lift up and carry an elderly bat around every day so he can pretend he's flying again, and that's the part of the world I think is worth fighting for

Soon the cycle of enshittification will move so fast & so predictably that you'll be able to mark the changing of the seasons by the mass migration of posters fleeing to danker platforms when the cold front of new venture capital management rolls in

Also: The Ancients offering up gifts before every act is a waaaaay better mechanic than the boss relics from the first game. Love the demon who offers you more energy every turn with the drawback that HE gets to play your first hand of cards.

Just as vibes go, it's a fun idea to have all the stuff that didn't "make it" into the new game still hanging around in the margins as almost archaeological remnants of the old Spire

One of my favorite bits about Slay The Spire 2 is the clever way they've incorporated the too-powerful"cut" cards and boss relics that aren't available in the regular parts of the game by having them offered up as junky antiques by what's basically a God of Hoarding

Jay solves the Lament Configuration and Pinhead ends up sparing him because he judges Jay to be too stoned & dumb to know what he’s doing

You know what would fix Hollywood? Bringing back the “comedians meet a monster” genre. Barb & Star Go to Elm Street. Ted Vs. Chucky. Jay & Silent Bob Meet Pinhead

this week on Nancy they go to the library

Honestly would have more respect for a theologian asking if a toaster could gain awareness of the Divine than this shit

“eXpLaIn HOw hUmAN COnSCioUSnESS wOrkS” you first, bro, nobody over here on Team Luddites has a raging hard-on for cosplaying as Dr. Frankenstein

I love it when AI Guys offer up arguments that- if they had the capacity to think about it for five seconds- actually boomerang back at them. Like, yes, human consciousness is mysterious & staggeringly complex—why do you think you’d be able to create a simulacra of something you don’t understand?

Beat my first run with the orb ponderer

it arrived

Also: “bored alien aristocrat who refuses to walk with his own feet who’s just doing this adventure for kicks” is an A+ playable character concept

There’s a lot of reasons why Slay The Spire 2 rules but “you can get a bird homie” is number one

Don’t talk to me or my bird son ever again

kind of crazy that if you have enough money and don't like what you see in the media, you can just buy up every film studio, news station, and social media app and change it