Sparkles

Gets on the front page of The Sun with just £500 a week?
This used to be a country.

ebenezer scrooge looking down from a window: You thrre boy! What day is it? Jason Vorhees: looking up silently at the window

Absolutely fuck off

Tinker? Tailor? Soldier? Spy? I hardly know 'er! I hardly know 'er! I hardly know 'er! No!

umm actually, neutrality means you're choosing the side of the milk hotel

A Cure for Wellness should have been scored by THE EELS.

Oops, sorry, that seems to have escaped from my drafts folder "niche jokes from 2016."

Correct. We all should

I understand it can be hard to be kind to yourself in your own head. It can feel cringe & unnatural & maybe even undeserved. I don't need you to turn into Mr. Rogers in your own head. But I do need you to quit kicking the sh*t out of yourself if your'e serious about recovery.

HER: let’s do reverse cowgirl

ME: okay

TOGETHER: lrigwoc

In the story of Humpty Dumpty it is never said that he is an egg. However, it is never said that he is NOT an egg. This means that any character in ANY story could be an egg unless explicitly stated otherwise. Keep that in mind when you read a Jack Reacher novel

I thought the album itself was fairly mediocre but I love the sacriligeous nature of this cover so much

The reason you can’t give a single inch on anything be it trans rights or dignity for unhoused people is that they, democrats and republicans alike, will take it and say thanks what else is in your pockets? They won’t say thanks actually.

Living with anxiety is so fucked because it’s like there’s a dog constantly trying to alert you that Timmy fell in the well, but you don’t understand dog, so you don’t know what exactly is wrong except the dog seems worried so you’re worried too

One of my reviews on Letterboxd got liked by someone

That someone has the greatest four favourite films you can possibly imagine

Horror film for men: the danger is 100 million zombies.
Horror film for women: the danger is a violent white guy.

The Cool Thing™️ about CPTSD and trauma responses is that you can KNOW it’s a trauma response, and you just don’t care, on account of the trauma.

One half of brain: hey isn’t this like, a bit much?

Other half: hell yea it is. That’s why we’re doing it

First half: fuck yea bro I’m in. FUCK EM!

Tweet that reads Leo Xander @STALLEON Stop taking social media so serious. Nothing here is real. Look at this chicken V - it is bigger than the car

I think about this tweet every time I feel something online start to curl its annoying little grip into my head

This experience is not universal, I stopped posting on Twitter as well and it took me YEARS to become CEO of the onion. Your mileage may vary.

wow congrats scotus on finally reading like 3 sentences in the constitution

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

YOU CAN GET EVERY DISCWORLD TOME ON EBOOK FOR LESS THAN THE COST OF A SUBWAY FOOTLONG COMBO.

USUALLY GETTING EVERY SINGLE BOOK LEGALLY IS LIKE 400+

NOT.

A.

DRILL.

www.humblebundle.com/books/terry-...

Okay, this is quite outstanding from Bedford Council.

Just goes to show that if you harm underage girls then 15 years after the accusations are public knowledge you'll get arrested for sharing government info and none of the paedophile stuff

Prince Andrew being arrested for giving away state secrets but not arrested for being a pedophile should tell you everything you need to know about Britain.

There Is No Antimemetics Division by qntm Signed, limited edition of qntm’s There Is No Antimemetics Division imagines a war fought not in secret, but in absence—a conflict against entities that erase themselves from perception and memory ali...

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it’s called a british gentleman’s cane because chapstick was taken

NANCY BY ERNIE BUSHMILLER P1-SLUGGO WAKES UP AND NOTICES IT’S FRIDAY 13th ON THE CALENDAR SLUGGO: OH, ОН - - FRIDAY THE THIRTEENTH--- P2- SLUGGO: I'M GONNA STAY IN BED ALL DAY SO NOTHING CAN HAPPEN TO ME P3- SLUGGO IS FEELING RELAXED AND SAFE IN THE BED, HE HAS HIS HANDS BEHIND HIS HEAD AND LOOK OF CONTENTMENT ON HIS FACE P4- SUDDENLY THERES A TREMENDOUS CRASH! THE CEILING PLASTER OVER HIS BED FELL ON TOP OF HIM

Nancy By Ernie Bushmiller
June 13,1952

How do you even remake this game. It would have to be a complete ground up reworking of basically everything about it. Absolutely wild thing to be considering.

APPARENTLY it costs the NHS over £300,000 a year to remove foreign objects from people's rectums. Why aren't we removing British objects instead? Was Brexit all for nothing? Gerry Paton, London

subscriptions >>> shop.viz.co.uk/viz353bs

Girl. Woman. Other.
By Bernadine Evaristo