Bumped into one of the neighbour's who looked in pain
He said
The doctor said that I wouldn't have kids after my vasectomy,
But when I got home they were still there!
#HaveALaugh
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#HaveALaugh
Latest posts tagged with #HaveALaugh on Bluesky
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Posts tagged #HaveALaugh
I've been offered the chance to join an Italian football team who don't even have their own stadium
AS Roamer
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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My eccentric aunt claimed to have created a racquet sport that was played against the clock
Tennish
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Did I ever, ever, never say, quite literally that I was one a bamboozled whatnot, gazing helplessly at the really great pair of thingamajig or are they thingamabobs. Answers on a postcard to the usual suspects now living in a cardboard box under Bingo bridge 🌉 😀 #funnybones #havealaugh
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The author of Miss Marole and Poirot once tried to buy one of the most famous auctioneers jist to keep her brand strong
Agatha Christies
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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While out walking this morning I thought of new melodies for classic Elvis songs.
I love Rock and Stroll
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Scientists have discovered a neuro divergent carnivore that moves between the Arctic and Antarctic
A bipolar bear
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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A word porn meme credited to Melissa Hunter that reads "I really do love this time of year-the Christmas music, the twinkle lights, the woman in front of me in line at Costco who just told her husband "We can give your cousin a pile of dog shit for all I care.""
Meme graphic with illustrated Christmas lights on top and bottom with text in between that reads "I am the human version of tangled Christmas lights."
Meme graphic with has trees subtly on a red background with one colorful one at the end of text that reads "Christmas trees are just ordinary trees that decided to become fabulous drag queens."
Sketch illustration meme that shows a simple person outline on top staring into and oval with writing underneath that is underlined and reads "Staring into the Abyss" and one of the same illustration with added features of the person holding a steaming cup and a gingerbread cookie. There are lights around the dark oval in this one is decorated with Christmas lights around it and plugged into an outlet. The underlined writing underneath this one reads "Staring into the Abyss in December."
Some Christmas eve funnies for you!
#MerryChristmasEve
#HaveALaugh
#Funny
#AltText
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In the building up to Christmas time, how do you improve the air quality in a church?
Add vent
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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My eccentric uncle is launching a social media site dedicated to dealing with blood sucking insects
Tick Talk
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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To celebrate her perennial holiday chart success, Mariah Carey is setting up a pet farm with only female animals.
She has cows, heifers, sows, mares, nannys, but cannot get a female sheep.
She states" All I Want For Christmas Is Ewes"
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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2 neighbours sell Christmas trees and do not see eye to eye. One strongly recommends the Fraser Fir, the other is strongly in favour of the Noble Fir.
Fair to say that there is a bit of needle between them.
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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I was once recruited by the Secret Service to infiltrate targeted groups through k-pop. Messages would be relayed via the lyrics of Gangnam Style
It was a Psy Op
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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This picture was on a HUGE screen, everyone did get a giggle. 🤪 and his presentation is the highlight of my entire month! #hero #profilepics #havealaugh #spreadjoy #belove
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Countdown to Thanksgiving
Have a good Monday
#Monday #MirthfulMonday #catsofbluesky #Thanksgiving #HaveALaugh
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My eccentric grandfather claims he invented the first electric guitar by first laying a piece of shaped wood across the wheel of a shopping trolley
A straddle caster
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Mirthful Monday
Poor Dr. Pepper. RFK Jr. revoked his license due to lack of autism in his formula...
#MirthfulMonday
#MondaysSuck
#HaveALaugh
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When it comes to famous American Western Outlaws
Billy The Kid was the GOAT
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Which insect smells the nicest?
A. Honey bee
B. Praying Mantis
C. Sticky Hornet
D. Odour ant
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Wrigleys back in the '70s tried to launch a range of Star Wars themed products, it failed after just 1 attempt
Chewie Gum
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Unfortunately I invested in a surfboard company that turned out to be a scam.
I can wave that money goodbye.
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Discovered a fascinating historical book about the Turkish born head of BMW who took control of car dealerships across Europe for decades.
It's call The Automan Empire
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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The BBC are launching a new show where well known people stay in a castle dressed in disguise as russet, red, yellow, white, purple/blue, fingerling, and petites.
The challenge is to vote off your nearest rival each week
Celebrity Taters
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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My overweight uncle is a conspiracy nut and believes governments are putting additives in food to make people heavier and more compliant.
He's a member of the Fat Earth Society
#lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Following the current popularity for natural wood toilet seats, a top UK comic has launched a tool to help smooth them and avoid splinters.
Loo Sanders
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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At her local knitting contest my aunt got the lowest score for material used and for the design of the cloud coat for her pet dog
The judge wrote
Wool F in sheep's clothing
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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My grandfather was badly beaten in his youth by a burglar hitting his head onto the base of a fireplace.
The doctor described it is a severe hearth attack
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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My eccentric aunt has developed a spray that keeps picnics free of annoying ground based insects, it's called....
Deter ants
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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Famous stylist Nicky Clarke once planned to launch a UK plane based celebrity service, where he styled as you flew from Londin.
British Hairways
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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The local Archbishop has opened a centre for members of the clergy to go and complain as much as needed.
It is a moanastery
#Lunchpun #RateMyPun #HaveALaugh
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