*Rams-Seahawks (✅): The second time on TNF this year that the Seahawks literally discover a brand new (rule change-induced) way to win an NFL game against a division rival. This time, the first ever walk-off 2-point conversion (I think). And wow, what a way to come from behind and go from looking like frauds to at least on the cusp of the top seed. (And hey, Nacua didn't go for any hospital passes that night, but at least he showed even more dumbassery after the game that thankfully didn't involve any more anti-Semitism!)
*Eagles-Commanders (✅): Congrats, Philly. You've won the division basically by default against the underbelly of the league. Now prove that it wasn't just feasting off basement dwellers, or else you're gonna be in for a rude awakening in a couple of weeks.
*Packers-Bears (✅): It's crazy how this is literally not too far from how Green Bay used to win against Chicago just a few years ago. But these aren't those Bears, and while we can't quite know if the Bears are for real, it sure feels easier to assume who's anything but now. (Also I think it's officially time for this country to stop sleeping on Kevin Burkhardt.)
*Chargers-Cowboys (✅): Again, nice little run you had there, Dallas, but it wasn't gonna last against teams like the Chargers.
*Buccaneers-Panthers (✅): Honestly, even if they cock up the momentum and miss the dance, I really hope this Panthers team is immortalized as one of the defining teams of this season in retrospect, if for no other reason than perfectly demonstrating how freaking drunk this year has been.
*Vikings-Giants (✅): McCarthy and the Vikings eeking out a run to salvage a .500 record only after any playoff hopes were long set ablaze would be easily one of the funniest potential outcomes of almost any other season, but in this season, I don't know if it'd even hit the podium.
*Bills-Browns (✅): I think Twitter probably would have (deservedly) torched itself to the ground if Shedeur happened to have the distinction of being Myles Garret's 23rd sack.
*Chiefs-Titans (❌): Wyandotte World: Fallen Kingdom (or alternatively, insert your favorite CaptainSparklez jokes)
*Bengals-Dolphins (❌): Yay, we finally had a good convincing win again that means absolutely nothing besides potentially being enough to bail Taylor and Tobin out of well-earned pink slips for yet another year. Yippee.
*Jets-Saints (✅): The March to Mendoza continues!
*Jaguars-Broncos (❌): I know I'm taking the L on this pick in the end, but frankly, was something like this really a shock for Denver?
*Falcons-Cardinals (✅): I'm genuinely starting to wonder if the Cardinals have had more one-score bottlings this year than seasons since ditching Chicago back during the Eisenhower administration where they've provided the NFL much of anything besides mediocrity.
*Raiders-Texans (✅): Well, that was certainly concerning for an already shaky Houston offense.
*Steelers-Lions (❌): Steeler bullshit remains undefeated for another season, what can I say? Anyway, where's my barf bag?
*Patriots-Ravens (✅): Guess Steelers bs is so powerful that even rivals in other games can choke at its will. Like seriously, it's so funny how the modern Ravens are basically just the Falcons in the alternate universe where they won Super Bowl LI by a score of 28-26 after a holding no-call screws the Patriots on the last 2-point try.
*49ers-Colts (✅): Beef History: Philip Rivers vs. Philip Rivers's Defenses
14th team voted out: Dallas Cowboys. The tribe has spoken.
[1 torch snuffed Survivor-style]
Lions, your torch remains alight for at least one more week.
3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th teams to win immunity into the 2025 NFL playoffs: Seattle Seahawks, Philadelphia Eagles, Chicago Bears, San Francisco 49ers, New England Patriots, Buffalo Bills, Los Angeles Chargers, and Jacksonville Jaguars! Come on over! (One at a time, though, please. I beg of you.)
[8 immunity necklaces awarded]
Packers, you'll have to wait at least one more week for immunity.
2025 Week 16 Picks: 12/16, or 75%
2025 Picks so far (Weeks 1-16): 161.5/240, or 67.3%
SortaSports: SortaPicks 2025 NFL Week 16 Recap #sortasports #sortapicks #week16 #nflweek16 #nfl #recap #picks #nflpicks #nflrecap