Latest posts tagged with #OneBattle on Bluesky
Moses made it. Thank goodness.
If this #movie killed Moses, I was going to turn it off, #OscarsHomework or no, but we see him running away from the gas station fire Marty caused
"No dog death," is about the 1 good thing I can say for this #film
Hating hating hating #MartySupreme
Not like #OneBattle or #F1, though 😆
#FilmSky
Pretty proud of my #OneBattle review. I just submitted it to @gabyfilmmaker.bsky.social at #Cinemania, and I'll obv tweet it out here when it's live.
@heresthething.bsky.social & @oboogie.bsky.social featured in a good way, and some idiot named Maurice featured less-positively 😆
#FilmSky #Movies
BOOOOOOO THIS MOVIE FUCKING SUCKED! BOOO! YOUR MOVIE IS BAD AND YOU SHOULD FEEL BAD!
1 of the dumbest, most-tasteless, tone-deaf piece-of-shit #movies I've ever seen in my life
This is really kind of unique. I think it's a troll, tho, not a legitimate artistic statement, but, boy, you guys paid the dealer by nominating this for every award in the world 😅
Crass trash.
#OneBattle
Yuuuuuuuck to all of this. Paul Thomas Anderson, dude, what are you thinking, man? You're so fucking weird.
I'm sure he was game, but I'm so sad that they made my hero Jim Downey say, "Semen demon," on film. That's going to bum me out forever.
#OneBattleAfterAnother #OneBattle #FilmSky
That's after Lockjaw says he believes Perfidia Beverly Hills was a sperm-thief.
This is dreadful again. Not funny.
This is the supposed-to-be-comedy-stuff or obviously-satire-idiot stuff. Yeah, it isn't. It's like gross fanfiction for an IP that doesn't exist apart from this. Even all the weird names and dialogue and all that shit that hit my ear weird and made me think PTA was out of touch and an annoying cunt, unequivocally did not come from Pynchon's novel Vineland, which is not that much similar to this, except for a few characters (generally) and a few situations. All the weird shit is PTA's invention, though.
![DUHHHHHRRRR Do ya reckon you could explain to us how that might work, Colonel Lockjaw? [slide whistle] [anvil sound effect] [Wilhelm Scream]](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:svg6uktunzvrvsh6xmnalxp2/bafkreid7vva2rabiv2h4anwkbpgrg3sj5j6uxe4zlaoch2oy2jmmrmmjwm)
DUHHHHHRRRR Do ya reckon you could explain to us how that might work, Colonel Lockjaw? [slide whistle] [anvil sound effect] [Wilhelm Scream]
I mean, he is doing all of his face-acting. I can't take that away from him. I love Tony Goldwyn btw, and he was perfectly cast for this dreadful, wish-it-never-was-written part. But he's doing exactly what he's supposed to. No issues with his performance.
I can't imagine actors are ever thrilled to play white supremacists, though, except of course for the ones who are, and they're the ones who really shouldn't play them.
"Raped-in-reverse," says Colonel Lockjaw, & then we get comedic cuts to CAC exec Virgil pulling faces.
Surprising there isn't an anvil & slide whistle. As a many-time survivor of rape, super glad Paul Thomas Anderson saw fit to tackle this, as well. Bravo, you tone-deaf cunt 😑
#OneBattle #FilmSky
Nobody accuse me of 'coming around' on this movie. It's finally managing to do the barest-minimum of its storytelling duties passably well. It's like it remembered what a movie was, and what needed to happen, and maybe had just a hint of what a fucking prick this guy is. I don't like him, and I still wish he'd been killed earlier, but I guess he and Willa have unfinished business, and he's not all bad. He remembered to say this and why it's important, instead of just being like, "you're a dumb fucking r-word; I'm your dad and this is important!' If he apologizes to the dude he called the r-word, that'd be nice as well, but it wouldn't make this movie good.
So, Bob finally remembers the password phrase, "Will no longer be so goddamned relevant," & like... that's all dumb & badly-written, but that is a satisfying little arc, if he sticks with it. It shows some growth. He cares about what other people care about. Granted, at literal gunpoint!
#OneBattle
Like, in some regards, this is a pornographic revenge fantasy. It's not even an uncommon genre of film. But this pulls its punches! I know Lockjaw was left alive for yuk-yuk purposes at the end (whatever), but, like, we hold on Willa's face while she empties the clip and we don't even hear the bullets land? That's so... literally bloodless.
Oof. The actors gives an efforting noise here, and grabs his (I think) leg or hip, and goes down, and then we just cut back to Willa, and she fires either 3 or 4 more rounds, I'm not sure, and presumably kills this dude, but we don't see it or feel it at all. We just hold on her face. It's a WEIRD choice for this movie.
We don't even get something in the sound design to tell us these bullets, like, hit him, even. We just see his body more slumped over in a second when we cut wide. It's odd. Don't know what to make of it.
Does it mean something? Who knows.
It's such a weird choice. We see the 1st shot Willa fires land. It's not squibbed, but there's sound design & the camera is on her target, Tim Smith.
But we hold on Willa's face as she fires 3-4 more rounds into him, & we don't even hear the impacts. We see his body sprawled, but... odd
#OneBattle
Yeah! Best Music, Original Score, Jonny Greenwood for One Battle After Another. I'm looking up what all the nominations for this actually are, and shitting bricks. Sean Penn nominated. Benecio Del Toro who's barely in this, also nominated, both in Best Supporting, taking up 2 of the 5 slots there. UNREAL. Did I slip into a parallel universe where everyone really loves shitty, schlocky movies??
Yeah, that seems about right. I don't know how to describe him. He has kind of lost-puppy, mixed with angry-lake-crane energy. And it seems that he must be a bald man, who affixes some kind of nylon mophead to his cranium for appearances. It's... I mean, it's a shame if you can't see it. Really something.
OMG THE SCORE WAS NOMINATED, TOO 🤣
This is Jonny Greenwood. I had to look him up to make sure he wasn't related to Lee Greenwood. He isn't, but...
I think this is the worst score I've ever heard. Ishtar was also really bad.
I'm having my own alternate-universe moment w/ this movie 🤯
#OneBattle
By far the funniest thing that's happened yet, which I definitively know, bc it's the only funny thing to happen yet. I had to pause to chuckle, though. Props for that, PTA.
Thank god, a moment of levity, lol 😅
I loved watching Bob fall three stories to the alley ground. Sadly, it didn't kill him, but it was hilarious to watch.
That's my first laugh, I think! At this alleged #comedy.
#OneBattle #FilmSky
Now, PTA could have just written this guy to know where the fucking place is at and be able to direct Bob there. But he didn't. He wrote it so that this guy first berates the guy who didn't believe on sight every stupid, crazy fucking thing Bob was saying, because Bob is a Very Important Person, and the operator should have just know that from his voice, I guess? He's a White Savior. But, like, not even a good one of those, and those are all bad narrative tropes. This movie is bad at everything it does, nearly, and seemingly deliberately so.
"Uhm, hello? I'm so sorry, Mr. War Hero, feel free to unleash all of the violent, psychopathic rape threats you like on me, sir. I'm so sorry to have stood in your way." Ironically, the way Bob is treating this guy is fascist as fuck.
This guy's actually kind of a fascist! For someone who so hates fascists, he employs a lot of their language and modalities.
Ugh, this is so pitiful and wrong-hearted 😔
"Give him the exact coordinates. Apologize to him. And mean it."
Then he hands the phone to the operator again, so Bob gets to abuse this guy who was just doing his job (correctly). Fuck this character and movie. Fuckkkkk them
#OneBattle #filmSky #film
"Relax, Pat, it's cool, it's so cool, baby, you're totally gonna know this. You're gonna know it?" There's SO much build-up. It's so fucking gross. We're meant to be on board with it, and it's awful. Fuck this movie.
Almost immediately: "Mexican hairless?" VOM Fuck Paul Thomas Anderson
"Heh! Woo!" And then he turns to scream at the cartoon caricature of libs PTA doesn't like, implicitly confirming that this was all good, heroic shit we all just witnessed. This is horrible. Arguably a sex crime.
This is truly reprehensible:
"You're gonna know it. You're gonna know it! What's my favorite kind of pussy?"
"Mexican hairless?"
"Heh! Woo!" [correct]
That's horrible. Horrible. Paul Thomas Anderson wrote that, & made a bunch of people film 2 actors saying that.
Shame 🔔
#OneBattle #FilmSky
This is so much funnier to me now that I’ve seen most of #OneBattleAfterAnother 🤣
youtu.be/X5J5AbdaprU?...
#SNL completely nailed this one.
#OneBattle #FilmSky #lol #comedy
sigh boooo... oooo. boo. I don't have the energy. There won't be as many bleets going forward, I bet. I can't keep getting infuriated by how fucking stupid and strident this fucking movie is. Right? Surely, I'll have my indignant rage exhausted at some point...
"What's your name?"
"Comrade Josh."
"Well, get a better name. That's a terrible revolutionary name," says GHETTO PAT 🤯
Oof. This is a REAL fucking CHORE, y'all. There's not enough weed in the goddamned world, for Bob or for me 😑
#OneBattleAfterAnother #OneBattle #FilmSky #MovieSky
![Bo [VO, phone]: "If you don't give me the rendezvous point..."](https://cdn.bsky.app/img/feed_thumbnail/plain/did:plc:svg6uktunzvrvsh6xmnalxp2/bafkreickgi2tktosmxua7oo72glibsboybdi2x3j7gp6pcysbjbc5xh4nu)
Bo [VO, phone]: "If you don't give me the rendezvous point..."
"I swear to God, I will hunt you down..." Great start, can't wait to see where this goes...
What a face, lol. This is some of his worst acting, I think. And he's known for terrible acting, in my book. "... and stick a loaded fuckin' hot piece of dynamite..." He's not gonna say up his ass, right? Surely not...
"Right up your fuckin asshole." Mm! OMFG THIS IS UP FOR BEST SCREENPLAY TOO, what the fuuuuuuuuck world am I living in?! I FEEL LIKE I'M TAKING CRAZY PILLS
BLESS his heart...
Leo's acting just as hard as he possibly can, but this #OneBattle script is such utter dogshit...
After calling this very-same guy the R-word (modified by 'fucking') (cool) earlier, he now threatens to rape & kill him.
We love this guy, don't we? Rooting for him? COOL guy!
This is the least-subtle and most hamfisted screenplay I've ever ever seen make it to any screen. This is clearly a scenario where PTA's reputation lets him just do anything, and then by God, we're all supporting him because this thing is a hit and people love it. BOOOOOOO IT FUCKING SUCKS SO MUCH BOOOOOOOOO
"You're a bad hombre, Bob."
HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONK 🚢
Take your pick. Each is as subtle as the other 😆
#OneBattleAfterAnother #OneBattle #FilmSky #badscript #badscreenplay #badwriting
Yeah, that whole reprehensible phone call would have def been another 'turn it off' moment if this weren't nommed for #BestPicture (insulting)
What unclever, clangorous, irritating, superficial commentary this provides, if any. Good God. Anyone who likes this should look inward
#OneBattle #FilmSky
FUCK this guy. JESUS Christ. What a fucking irredeemable, degenerate piece of trash. I'm supposed to root for him? What, because he likes his daughter and makes her say "I love you" to him? God, I hope someone kills him SO badly. Fuck!
Casual R-word.
What a choice! Ladies & gentlemen: Paul Thomas Anderson (& Leo was happy to oblige, too).
Shame someone didn't put a bullet right in his dumb head before he had the opportunity to drop that little ray of sunshine.
Cool guy, Bob! Really hope he makes it 🙄
#FilmSky #OneBattle #boo
Wouldn't mind if he did, though! Just turned that corner, and blam! like that idiot earlier that I also didn't care got killed.
So, now here's the contrast!
This scene, despite being 10x the length (so far) of Willa's extraction, has ZERO TENSION bc I DO NOT CARE WHETHER HE LIVES OR DIES.
Actually, that's not true. I'm rooting hard for him to die, but I know he doesn't just get shot here, lol
#OneBattle #FilmSky #MovieSky
#OneBattle 's score is TERRIBLE again.
It's not like I didn't grow up playing #jazz & #progrock. I can totes appreciate a chaotic, amelodic section or movement of a work, but this musically is building to nothing, amounting to nothing.
It's a child banging on a piano. Hard.
#FilmSky #FilmScore
I've just got to believe that! (The image isn't even relevant to my point; just time-stamping). I cannot think of a weirder, clangier, tone-deafier, cringier way to get into this part of the film, which is what this is really about, anyway. Like, all that AAVE 'get a load of this good pussy' shit was SO insulting. I can't say whether it should or shouldn't be offensive to you, but it offended me, and my sensibilities, to imagine Paul Thomas Anderson at his keyboard, inventing this psychotic, flat, one-dimensional caricature of a sexpot (whilst simultaneously naming another character Junglepussy), and like... Yuck! Do the rest of y'all not hate that?
It took 1h5m to get into #OneBattle 's Fun & Games.
And, like, I get it! I totally see how an alt-universe fascist chase could be fun... like, I know where this is going, & there *are* fun parts.
But what got us here was so monumentally stupid & bad-faith, it has to ruin it. It HAS to 😑
#FilmSky
Everyone who told me I 'didn't get it,' & that this movie is over my head owes me an apology, lol.
This is 1 of the least-subtle, least-trenchant, least-capable attempts at social commentary I've ever seen committed to the screen.
It's over no one's head, guys 🤣
#OneBattle #FilmSky #MovieSky
Yeah, man, me too.
Ironically, watching this movie puts me in a similar, degenerative/degenerate state, wherein I need some kind of drug to pacify or mollify me as I'm subjected to more of this.
I get it, dude. This movie sucks. Let's all smoke up, so we can tolerate the rest of it. Brb 💨
#OneBattle #FilmSky #Movies
Yeah, I totally get it, but I really don't think PTA was the guy to bring this story to us, lol. This is utterly dogshit, and it's so hamfisted, I'm rolling my eyes, not being gripped by fear. You know when I'm gripped by fear? Whenever I see another angle on the Alex Pretti murder or the Renee Good murder, or hear updates on Liam Ramos and see him being coerced by real-life people. This movie doesn't strike me as having anything worthwhile or even substantive to say about all of this, so it feels UTTERLY trivial in this dogshit, bad movie and kind of insults me, if I'm honest.
I feel that we're meant to be shocked or moved by these images/scenes/tableaux of #fascism, but like, we have it here IRL, too.
I'm perhaps a bit desensitized, plus, it's literally NEVER been handled more ham-handedly, & I'm not just talking in #film; books, YouTube videos, whatever.
#OneBattle
Love the skirt, too, and good thing, because we're gonna see a BUNCH of it.
It's a fun look! I'm actually enjoying something now, thank god, and it's because I have Willa to hold onto and root for. In terms of Bob, I'm just hoping that PTA thinks it's more narratively satisfying to kill him, so I can watch him die.
Yeah! I'm like, "ooh, I hope they don't catch her," whereas with every other prior character, I was, like, "yeah, who cares, they all seem terrible anyway."
This is curious 🤔
I'm actually feeling tension (something not annoyance!), & I posit it's bc Willa has a spark of humanity or is interesting/compelling.
I literally don't gaf if every other character lives or dies (& I'd prefer Bob die).
Shouldn't take 1hr to find a char to like 😑
#OneBattle
If I found #OneBattle funny (& I'm proud to say that it is 1 of the least-funny things I've seen since #Ishtar, which is, admittedly, even less funny), I'd be deeply embarrassed re: that, & definitely wouldn't tell anyone.
It's been a *barrage* of users here proudly telling me it's hilarious, tho 😬
Liked her immediately! The writing is still terrible, but that's not her fault, of course, and she's bringing something to this role, and frankly, to this film, that it DESPERATELY needed. To, like, even be remotely watchable.
This reminds me of Transformers, when Shia LeBoeuf is telling Megan Fox to get in the car, "I need you to get in the car... trust me... just do it, get in the car," except this is a dad making his daughter say it. BARF! Which is probably the point? But also, this isn't adding up to anything. I reiterate: barf.
Woof.
Here we go again.
I immediately vibed w/ Chase Infiniti, whatever her char's called now. Florence, idk, who cares. Thank god there's finally someone to root for.
"Say it... say it, Baby!"
[sigh] "I love you."
YUCK 🤮
God, I hope "Bob" doesn't survive this #film...
#OneBattle #FilmSky
Jim Downey! Good to see him. He's great. It lends credence to the idea that this movie thinks it's funny, but holy fucking shit, is it not, lol. It's one of the least-funny things I've seen since Ishtar.
But this guy is responsible for one of the funniest things I've ever heard in my life, and that's the first few minutes of the CONAF episode I linked to.
Now, I need y'all to know that this is Jim Downey, 1 of the most legendary #comedywriters of all time, & his appearance on #CONAF remains maybe the hardest I've ever laughed at a podcast.
"Jeff Epstein? The NY financier?"
🤣
youtu.be/Tn7fks2UDRE?...
I think #OneBattle thinks it's a #comedy 🤔
I award you the Bedford-Forrest Award for... Sorry, come again? It sounded like you said the name of the award you were handing me was the same as a Confederate general, but that wouldn't make any sense... Oh, you did? Okay, pin that bad boy on me, then. Call me Forrest Fucking Gump. This movie is TERRIBLE.
THE BEDFORD-FORREST AWARD lolol
How #ForrestGump of this #movie 🤣
Jesus fucking Christ... so is this an alternate timeline where the South won or something? What is this? Does it think it's satire? Or funny? It's def not either 🤔
#OneBattle #FilmSky #MovieSky #OneBattleAfterAnother
So they wiped out the #French75, and I don't even know how I'm supposed to feel. Like, they were all kind of faceless assholes with VERY nebulous goals who hurt people & blew shit up constantly.
I sincerely don't know. This movie doesn't either, I don't think.
I don't care, for sure.
#OneBattle
I really noticed this one, positive feeling just POP out of all the irritation and revulsion and embarrassment/cringe, and it became so apparent: I haven't had another good feeling watching this yet. This is the first one.
FINALLY! A GOOD FEELING HAPPENED!
It was just because this real-life, adorable, actual baby was on screen for 4s, but all of a sudden, I was, like, FLOODED with warmth. It was shocking.
And I realized: I've felt only bad things since #OneBattle started, lolol 🤣
Something to build on!
#FilmSky
