#OTOGWebcomic

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

4 months ago

Gilda: "The topping? Elbow macaroni made from durum wheat. The sauce? Puréed San Marzano tomatoes. The cheese? Mozzarella and provolone soaked in Sowrento lemon juice. The score?" *takes bite out of it… and the cheese explodes in her mouth* "Dieci su dieci!" Wendy: "Wow, Gilda, you really know your Itacavallian ingredients!" Gilda: "But of course! Any self-respecting Itacavallian knows where in town to get the best Itacavallian cuisine! Also, I know a lot of baking. Itacavallian cuisine and citrus recipes are my specialty." Margo: *farts like a duck quacks* "Where’s the duck? Heheh."

Wendy: "Margo, don’t fart in front of Gilda. You barely know her yet." Gilda: "Oh, it’s okay, Wendy. It’s natural. Better out than in, I always say!" Wendy: "Are you Shrek?" Gilda: "No, but that is a great movie, and those are great words to live by!" (to Margo) "And that was a good duck, Margo. But do you know how to elephant?" Margo: "Elephant?" Gilda: *farts like an elephant trumpets* Margo: "Woah… that’s a hell of a rip, Gil! I can call you Gil, right?" Gilda: "Don’t see why not." Margo: "Say, Gil, your elephant was cool. But do you know how to mouse?" Gilda: "Mouse?"

Margo: *farts like mice squeak* Gilda: *reacts with mock-fear as she farts like an elephant trumpets* Wendy: "Well! If that’s how we’re behaving!" *farts like a motorcycle engine sound* Gilda: "Ha ha ha ha!" Margo: "Woah, the motorcycle!" April: *sees Gilda, Wendy, and Margo laughing from their farting contest*

April: "Sae, ‘t’s a fahtin’ contest weh havin’, ah weh? Well, lasses, git a looda dis ‘un!" Wendy: "April, NO!!!" April: *farts a giant cloud of spray* "Haw haw haw haw haw!" Wendy: (holding nose) "Dammit April, we told you not to take part in these!" Gilda: (nose bleeding) "Why as a mephitine would you do that?!" Margo: "I think I swallowed my puke."

#OTOGCOMIC: "Better Out Than In" (Chapter 7)

Gilda, Wendy, April, and Margo pass the time at a bus stop… by passing something else.

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectFairchild

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

9 months ago

April: "Naes'nse! Kalehmata b'lon's oan olives, nae cheeks, nae pahred wit' bronze! Ye need pro'er blush. So'one o' yer fur taene, coral'd look best oan ye." Margo: *coughing from the hairspray* Gilda: "You're coughing from the hairspray now, Margo, but trust me! The volume on those ginger locks of yours, you'll look like Bonnie Raitt! Minus the... streak of white." Wendy: "While Margo is still the focus of the conversation." *to Margo* "I think you owe Gilda anything she wants. This was, *your* mess. Your mess she took time out of *her* day to deal with!" Gilda: *takes off the hoops when she sees ones like she described* "Well, first things first. I'd like those magenta hoop earrings. They'll compliment the greens."

Wendy: "If you won't take the silver hoops, can I --" Gilda: *puts them on Wendy* "Sì, sì, avranno un aspetto migliore con la pelle nera del denim ciano!" April: "An' daene!" Margo: *pats newly-permed hair* "Oh, heh, my hair *does* look cool! Got real bounce to it and... wait, what was that Gilda just said? I don't speak Horspanish." Gilda: "That was Itacavallian, actually. I'm Tarantina. Speaking of which, *seconda*, I'd like for all of us to have some genuine Itacavallian pizza. Any-yo's familiar with Ennio's?" *the Tetrad look confused* Margo: "Any... yo's?"

*in front of Ennio's, a restaurant with a worn-down sign illuminated by floodlights* Gilda: "*Ennio's*, Margo. Best pizza, best Itacavallian cuisine in Albaneigh county! And quite cultured, too. They always play Pavarotti's 'Nessun dorma' at 6PM on Friday's." April: "Well, t'is 'splens ye goin' silent fer th' pahst t'irteh-fahve minutes." Gilda: "That reminds me, thanks for doing my hair and makeup, April." Margo: "Gil, are those... gloves and mary janes? Do you... *willingly* wear those things?" Gilda: *in a square panel* "Why, of course I do, Margo! I'm the shape of this panel and proud of it!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "Excesscore" (Chapter 6, p9-11)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectIndy

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

9 months ago

April: "Ye're k'saustin' t'be roond sometimes, y'knoo 'at, Mahgo?" Margo: "Oh, so it's *my* fault a bunch of fundies get in such an uproar over a little grape juice?" April: "Nae, bu'is yer foolt fer ge'in' 'em affah oor 'eads! Noo find yerself ano'er glasses, ye goon! Them square frames'll gitche foond oot!" Margo: *takes off glasses and blows a raspberry at April. She quickly finds...* "Oh hey, it's them Cruise sunglasses! Imma snag!" *puts them on* Wendy: "Margo, April, this is Gilda Grime. Sister of that Terence you hear me complain about." Gilda: "Ciao!" Wendy: "You owe her thanks for distracting the X-Angels."

Gilda: "'Crooked teeth and flaming hair'. Obviously you're Margo." Margo: "They ain't crooked, they're dental Stonehenge!" *looks at Gilda's earrings* April: "Streend lass, i'n' she? Knoon 'er since kindeh, Mahgo loves bein' a trooblemekah. She go' 'erself kicked ootah co'il'yn class 'is summah fer dro'in' a spidah doon the teachah's cleavage. Ah've a bro'er, 'ey sawr it ha'un, seh'twas 'lahrious watchin' 'er squahm like a wahm. Wish I couldah sehn it mehself." Gilda: "Holy Scot, you're a shit!" *gasps at her gaffe* April: "'s 'keh, Gilda, ah knoo'at we meant. B'sides, bettah t'byah shit than a Toreh or Repu'ican."

Margo: *walks over from a checkout counter after buying earrings and the sunglasses* "I did not drop a spider down Mrs. Flint's melons! It was a harvester. They're more like scorpions. And I didn't do it, Buffett did. On my command. Nobody tells me the Seagull Shuffle isn't a real dance! Or else they answer to Buffett! Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky." Wendy: "Ah yes, the classic Charlamagne quote. That he never said." Gilda: "What the f*** is the Seagull Shuffle?" Margo: "Strut, step! Strut, step! Peck the ground! Flap your arms and airward bound! *punches out a ceiling tile*

*Wendy covers Gilda's nose from the falling debris from the ceiling* [redneck blattid]: "'ey you! Stay off my property! I could shoot you!" Margo: "Shoot me? What gun do *you* have?" April: "*I've* go' a gun called a Foozeh, an' is go'n' up yer ass if ye doon' ploop't oan th' beench!" *April starts styling Margo's hair* Margo: "Hmph!" Gilda: "Haha, footsie, Uzi. Bad pun, but I'll take it." April: "Ye're nae 'in the cleah yerself, Gilda. Ye could use mascara oan them lashes o'yahs, an' --" *notices Gilda's cheeks* "Aw god, please tell me ye donnae pinch yer cheeks 'ns'eedah usin' blush!" Gilda: "Uh, it's... bronzo livido? Import blush."

#OTOGCOMIC: "Excesscore" (Chapter 6, p5-8)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectIndy

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

9 months ago

Gilda: "Hm. You know, I don't know if these earrings are a good fit for this outfit. Should've gone with chunkier and more colorful hoops. Than thin and silver. I've still got five bucks on my gift card and twenty in my wallet, that should find me a pair. What do you think, Cameron?" Wendy: *blushing* "Uh, if you don't mind me saying, I think the hoops look cute on you." Gilda: "Well, thank youuuuu... uh, you!" Wendy: "Wendy. I just wanted to thank you for getting Zephyr off our backs. That was cool. Also, how'd you make it 'rain blood'? Some magic trick?" Gilda: "You *could* call it a magic trick. You could also call it, using my own blood, straight from il grande naso nero!"

Wendy: *shocked* "YOUR OWN BLOOD?! WHAT?! Why would you use that?!" Gilda: "I've got a sensitive nose, prone to bleeding. Doctors say I have an excess of cartilage supported by too little membrane. The excess cartilage's also why my nose is so big. I get compared a lot to Jimmy Durante, being big-nosed and Itacavallian. As for why I used my blood... normally, I wouldn't. But you know how Jesus-peddlers like Zephyr piss themselves about witches, and their ideas of what they do with blood. So why not troll them with some pioggia insanguinata, con sangue vero?" Wendy: *looks disturbed before realizing who Gilda is* "Wait, hold on. Do you have a brother named Terence?" Gilda: "Um, yes! How did you know?" Wendy: "He and my sisters like to make fun of your nosebleeds." Gilda: "Roz and Maddie Wyler, you mean? They're your sisters?" Wendy: "Unfortunately."

Wendy: *over image of abandoned mattress store* "Luckily, they'll not be living with me for much longer. They recently bought an empty space in an old strip mall in Hatcherville on the cheap, and they're turning it into their own living space. It's quite the roach-nest. Used to be a mattress store." Gilda: "Oh, yeah. I know the place. Marty's Mattress Mart." *over images of a ranine who bears strong resemblance to Mike Lindell* "I never liked that Martin Randall guy. Always smiling like a psycho in his ads, and always seems to love his products too much. Not to mention being a rabid conspiracy nut." *back in Core* "Terence has been talking about moving into that place, too, and splitting rent. Figures. Only idioti creduloni such as them would take up the offer to --" [anisopteran employee]: "Free sample!" *sprays Gilda with perfume* Gilda: "Hey now, you're supposed to ask first! What if I don't like the smell?" Wendy: "Well, they're getting what they're paying for. As I said, roach-nest. And of course Marty Randall."

Wendy: "Wait, split rent? What job does he have?" Gilda: *sniffs perfume* "Oh hey, lemon. Never mind, I like this." *to Wendy* "Wait, what was the question again? Oh, uh, none yet. But he has an interview at a florist tomorrow, Vair-dee-er's." Wendy: "Verdier's." Gilda: "Yeah, them." *over Robert Mapplethorpe-style image of rose* "And I'll give credit where it's due, he's surprisingly good with flowers. Three years ago, he won second prize with an 'avant-garde' he submitted to a 'single hybrid tea' category at a rose competition at Albaneigh." *back to Core* "He was also on the Les Clark flamingoes basketball team with Mr. Verdier's son. So there's also nepotism going for him. Never mind our dumbass siblings, though. Can I just say how much I love the Excesscore section here? I got this whole outfit there!" Wendy: "I noticed. So did I with my outfit! Aside from the boots. Rebelcore. Speaking of which, I've notices Excesscore has a bit of a 1980s theming. Why the name? There some connection?" Gilda: "Oh yeah, that's the nickname for the decade. You know how the 1920s are the Roaring Twenties and the 1950s are the Nifty Fifties? The aesthetics of the latter here even being called 'Niftycore'? Well the 1980s are the Excessive Eighties, so named for how big everything was. Big hair, big synths, big gadgets... what a big f***-up we made electing Reagan. And if you don't mind, you look excess-ively cool in the aesthetic! Heheh." *Gilda winks as Wendy blushes*

#OTOGCOMIC: "Excesscore" (Chapter 6, p1-4)

Gilda meets Wendy, April and Margo at one of the mall's stores.

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectIndy

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

[crow]: *flies up on Gilda's command* "CAWWW!" *flies by Gilda's side as they arrive at the entrance of Core, the store April mentioned last chapter* Gilda: "Ugh, I hate that f***ing logo! A store dedicated to quirky aesthetics, and they go with squished Shellvetica!" Zephyr: "Avians! After the witch!" *the avians of Zephyr's crowd fly up to Gilda's level* Gilda: "Porca puttana! Quick! In here!" *she and the crow run into Core*

[aquiline Kevin]: "I saw the witch go that way!" [fuliguline Karen]: "Well, I saw her go this way!" [aquiline Kevin]: "Let's split!" [random X-Angel 2]: "We'll make her burn, like the Wicked Witch of Oz!" [random X-Angel 3]: "Whoops, forgot my pitchfork!" Gilda: *revealed to have been hiding in plain sight with the mannequins, in a 1980s-inspired outfit* "'Wicked Witch of Oz'. Wow." *jumps onto the ground next to the crow, and a lepismatine shopper* [lepismatine]: "Geez, Brobdingnagian! Watch where you land!" Gilda: "Now, you see, Cameron... mind if I call you Cameron? 'cause you're a crow? That's how you know somebody's stupid. There was no 'Wicked Witch of Oz' that burned. She was the 'Wicked Witch of *The West*', and she *melted*."

Gilda: "You'd think a bunch of witch-haters would be up on their witches. Especially the most famous one. Oh, and since I promised it." *pulls quarter out of her pocket* "Your quarter! Again, don't know if you'll use it as a shovel or what, but if you decide to buy something with it, remember: money *always* buys happiness!" Auburn MacGrew: "Hey! That's not the saying, you knucklehead!" Millie Milton: "She's just being funny, Auburn. Let it go."

#OTOGCOMIC: "Pioggia Insanguinata" (Chapter 5, p8-10)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectTank

(I hope Jordan appreciates that last joke)

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Zephyr: "AAAH-HOO-WEEEEE!!!" Gilda: "Alright, let's get rid of this thing." *'Put Your Hand in the Hand' by Ocean begins playing over the intercom* "Oh, wow, what a time for musica gospel to play!" Zephyr: "It's raining blood! What... what devil magic is this?!" [sciurine Karen]: "She's up there, reverend! The kit-sow with the green dress and pigtails, it's her devil magic!" [crowd]: "The witches, we've found them! Wait a minute... she wasn't at the fountain! My god, they've recruited another! Or maybe the 'Margo' leporine's taken on another form!"

Gilda: "Another form? Recruited? Per cortesia, siete tutti degli idioti! You see... *I'm* the one who recruited *them*!" Zephyr: "You? But... but that's not possible! The leporine with the crooked teeth and flaming hair, she told us herself, she's a witch! And we saw her lead a sciurine and mephitine! Were we... bamboozled?" Gilda: "Lead, lead. Yes, she would have you thinking she's the leader, wouldn't she? That's why I recruited her! Don't you know that leporines are renowned for their ability to trick their foes, escape just about an perilous situation they find themselves in? And that's why I took her under my wing, you see. I knew she'd be naturally up to the task of misdirecting you all from the *real* leader! And that leader? Well, asino... you're lookin' at her! CORVO SOLDATO!"

[crow]: *swoops down and attacks the crowd, largely focusing on Zephyr. Gilda watches in amusement as the crowd panics and the music continues playing* [random X-Angel 1]: "MOTHER OF F***ING CHRIST!!!" Gilda: 🎵 Put your hand in the hand of the lion from the -- 🎵 "Torna!" 🎵 Gullileeeee!🎵 (yes, song lyrics are altered to fit the vocabulary of this universe)

#OTOGCOMIC: "Pioggia Insanguinata" (Chapter 5, p5-7)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectTank

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Gilda: *leaves Griswold's, hearing the chanting of the X-Angels on her way out* "Hm?" *notices them* "Hm!" X-Angels: "WITCHES! WITCHES! WITCHES! WITCHES! WITCHES! WITCHES!" Zephyr: "You shalln't hide forever, witches! Once we find you, it's back to the inferno for all of you! Especially you, flame-headed freak called 'Margo'! Gilda: *steam coming out of ears like cartoon character* "X-Angels!"

Gilda: "Really, nobody picked this up yet?" *picks up the Sweet and Sour cup from chapters 1 and 2* "Hm." *ducks behind a compost bin* "Ugh... hope nobody sees this." *punches herself in the face, causing her nose to bleed and her eyes to go derped* "Uhhh... Ithinkicanseeaspiderrrrr" *sees a crow has been watching her the whole time* "Huh? That crow knows... oh, porca puttana. Alright, crow. How would you like a qua -- some materials, for your nest?"

Gilda: "Then when I say 'corvo soldato', that's 'soldier crow' in Itacavallian, you swoop down and ambush Zephyr and his weirdo minions. Then return to me when I say 'torna'. Should be obvious what that means. And then this is yours." *shows quarter* "It's called, a 'quarter'. It's what I call currency. It's what you probably call a part of your nest. Or a shovel. Maybe. I don't know. You'll find a use for it. I know it. Mr. Spectrous says, after all, that you corvids are smart birds." *sees X-Angels coming around the corner* X-Angels: "WITCHES! WITCHES! WITCHES!" [Adler's self-insert]: "Oh, hell no!" Gilda: "Oh, here they come. And there's Luke Zephyr leading them! Nome stupido. Si va in scena!"

Gilda: *looks at the cup of nosebleed blood, waiting to make her move, before...* "Pioggia... INSAGUINATA!!!" *...tossing it onto Zephyr's head*

#OTOGCOMIC: "Pioggia Insanguinata" (Chapter 5, p1-4)

Gilda encounters Zephyr and the X-Angels cult.

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectTank

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

[ursine Kevin]: "She spat out the blood of Christ!" [vulpine Karen]: "That's a sign of possession by Satan!" [cricetid Kevin]: "That girl is a demon spawn!" Wendy: *facepalms* April: *rolls eyes* [crowd]: "She's the antichrist! Demon from Hell! Soldier of Satan! Possessed by Satan! She's a witch! Devil child! Demon! Antichrist! Witch! Possessed! Rosemary's baby! Stone her! Burn her!" Margo: "What in El-Ahrairah's name are you guys -- uh... I-I-I mean... Yes! Yes, I am! A witch! Margo Hynde, practitioner of the Satanic arts! Throw up the horns, six-six-six! Haaaaail Satan! Now make way, mortals, I need the floor for a pentagram."

Wendy: *covers Margo's mouth* "Uh, never mind my friend here, she's just messing with you! She's not a Satanist, she's not a witch. She's just a... uh..." April: "A bampot! Aye, a tootal bampot!" Wendy: "April, don't talk for now. They'll think you're..." Dirk Shameron: "Speaking in tongues!" Wendy: "Son of a bitch, I tempted them!" April: *puts hand over mouth; an anime-style anger symbol resembling the Scottish flag appears on her head* Zephyr: "Spitting out the most precious blood, dressing as a hoodlum, speaking in *tongues?!* My goodness! I knew New Porkers, Grunvalians to be sinners and heathers, but *never* would I have imagined actual witches! *Satanist* witches! Mingling with mortals! It's disgraceful! It's despicable! It's demonic!"

Zephyr: "You... all three of you! You are ABOMINATIONS! YOU ALL SHALL BURN!!!" [crowd]: *all get angry at the three... except for a phascolarctine who has realized how stupid the X-Angels are, and holds up a sign reading 'THIS IS TOO WEIRD, I'M OUT!'* Wendy: "Uh oh."

Margo, Wendy, and April run from the X-Angels as they try to chase them down. Margo has very much enjoyed trolling them.

#OTOGCOMIC: "That's Not Fruit Punch" (Chapter 4, p9-12)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectFonz

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

April: "Rev'rend Zepha? Who's 'at?" Wendy: "Reverend Luke Ulysses Zephyr. Baptist pastor from Mihama, Flamingorida." Margo: "Dang it, this talk of 'daily bread' got me hungry." Wendy: "He's the leader of the X-Angels, far right group. A bunch of Junie Harper-types that spew hatred and fear-monger about Satan, instead of preaching and practicing charity like the Jesus they claim to follow. They're not Christians, they're Jesus-brand bigots. And they've been going about the Bible Belt and a few of its neighbors all summer, gaslighting millions into believing their regressive bile. I thought somewhere like Iowool or Wyomink would be their next visit. But apparently Zephyr's got the nerve to show his ugly mug in New f***ing Pork. Let's get out of here." April: "Guid t'inkin', Wendy. 'ey, ye maybeh wanna gae t' Core 'r so'in?" Wendy: "The clothes place? Sure, I've wanted to try --" *sees Margo has run off* "Where's Margo?"

Zephyr: "And even knowing one of them would betray him, he still proceeded to break the bread, and bless it. And he said, 'eat this, for it is my --'" *notices the bowl of communion wafers is empty* "Empty?! The devil?!" *sees some of the wafers floating in the fountain... coming from Margo, who has treated herself to them* "You!" Margo: "Ehhh... what's up, doc?"

Wendy: "MARGO, WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU DOING?!?! THEY'RE GONNA MAKE HASENPFEFFER OUT OF YOU, YOU STUPID F***ING BITCH!!!" Zephyr: "Miserable little fool! The devil are you doing?!" Margo: "Whaddya mean what am I doing? I'm eating the crackers you left out." Zephyr: "C-- Crackers? Those are not crackers, you dumb girl! They're wafers! The body of our --" Margo: *jumps toward a carton of grape juice that she thinks is...* "Ooh, fruit punch! NYAAAAAHHHHH" Wendy: "NOOOOO!!!" April: "AAUUGGHH!!"

Margo: "Bottoms up!" *chugs the grape juice down, only to gag and spit it out onto Zephyr* "Blegh! That's not fruit punch!" Zephyr: "GRRRRRHHH!" Wendy: "F***ing hell, Margo, what have you done?!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "That's Not Fruit Punch" (Chapter 4, p5-8)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectFonz

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Margo: *hums to herself* "Huhwuhzisnow?" *sees that the sign reads 'COME SMELL OUR SWEET CORNCOCKLES FRESH FROM THE PIKANSAS FIELDS'. She laughs as she pulls down letters from the sign, making it read 'COME SMELL OUR SWEET CORN FRESH FROM THE ASS'* "HAHAHAHAHA!" Wendy: "Again with the sign prank, Margo? Get moving before somebody sees you!"

April: "Ye're th' oonleh un who finds 'at funneh, y'knoo!" Margo: "Oh, I don't know. I think what I thought up for 'Congratulations Marc Davis Junior Jaspers on winning regionals three years in a row' banged." *cutaway to the vandalized sign, which reads 'THE JUNIOR JASPERS ARE NASTY AND REGINA WOOLING IS A VILE GROSS --'...* Wendy: *dialogue box censors a certain vulgar word* "You got suspended for that, remember?" Margo: "Yeah, but it was worth it! Once I meddled with that sign, I never again felt Regina Wooling's wet, hoofed finger in my ear! We leporines, we kick back when we need to. And we kick back hard. We're not just a bunch of vegetarian pacifists that take the idea of being lunch lying down." Wendy: "...whatever." April: *noticing the crowd of patrons* "Ehhh... lasses? Whar d'ye s'poose those o'ter patrons're headed? Thar all goin' in the same d'rection, 's naw us'al!" Wendy: "I don't think it's any of our business, April."

April: "Yeah, bu's'it nae a bi' streenge 'at ah'lem're heeded 'at weh? What could be o'er 'ere 'at's sae in'res'in?" Wendy: "Wait, hold up, I hear shouting! Margo, see if you can here whoever that is from here." Margo: "I think I can, I'm on it!" *holds up ear. A voice is shouting, 'GIVE US THIS DAY OUR DAILY BREAD'* "Oh, it's just some hungry weirdo. Yelling about his 'daily bread'. Whatever that is. Sounds delicious. Wonder if it's sourdough." Wendy: "'Daily bread'? Uh, no, Margo, that's from the Lord's prayer. Christian mythos. I think that's a pastor we're hearing." Margo: "Pastor, huh? Think he's calling everyone in the mall 'sinners'?" Wendy: "Most likely."

Wendy: "Let's watch from behind here." *hides behind wall, along with Margo and April. She gasps when she sees...* Zephyr: "Attention, sinners of Grunvale! Gluttons, heathens, slothful lot! Salvation is not a product you can just walk in to a store and buy off a shelf! Salvation comes from accepting as your Lord and savior, the one who in Luke twenty-two-seventy said himself was the son!" Wendy: "Dear God no... it's Reverend Zephyr!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "That's Not Fruit Punch" (Chapter 4, p1-4)

Margo gets herself, Wendy, and April, into trouble with a crazed alt-right group.

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectFonz

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

The logo for 'The Oddball Tetrad of Grunvale, New Pork', with 'ODDBALL TETRAD' presented in Englishman's Teeth font, and all other text presented in Amcap Eternal.

Here's a thread for you guys to keep up with the #OTOG webcomic! I'll even make this easier for you to find by giving it the hashtag #ProjectYamauchi, named for the founder of Nintendo to fit with the video game theme of the chapters' working titles.

#OTOGWebcomic

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

An umlaut-O with a crown, to reference how the Gerbilman (German) words for 'king' and 'queen' are spelled with the form of the letter.

A volcano erupts, spelling 'DUH' with its cloud, as a reference to how similar the Eaglish (English) and Gerbilman (German) words are to each other.

Chandler: "Gilda, there's a lot of filler in this essay. I wasn't looking for your opinion on Jerry Springer. Plus, you didn't translate 'Eisfrei'." Gilda: "Because it was a mistranslation of 'Eisberg'." Chandler: "In a strange way, however, you did manage to go above and beyond translating words you weren't expected to. I think a B-plus oughta sum it up." Gilda: "B-plus? Uh, yeah, sure! I'll take it! It's B-ene! Heheh."

#OTOGCOMIC: "Hooked on Mnemonics" (Chapter 3, p9-11)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectMonaco

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

A profile view of Mount Hatcher at dusk, drawn by Gilda.

[Annoying Orange parody]: "Orange you sad you don't have the same name in Gerbilman? Nyahahahahaha!"

Roz: *blows smoke into Gilda's face as Maddie laughs*

[skull]: "Howdily doodily!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "Hooked on Mnemonics" (Chapter 3, p5-8)

#OTOG #OTOGWebcomic #ProjectMonaco

The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Gilda: *cuts a ribbon and ties it at the end of one of her braids, then looks in the mirror at her work* "Blagh! Heheh. I'm so cute." *grabs controller* "For processing Gerbilman at blast speed." *grabs book off shelf* "Pages out? Mr. Spectrous, spines out! Sempre!" *sits*

Gilda: *sees map of 'The Colors', which includes the town of Grunvale* "Oh, would you look at that. A map of this town and its neighbors. Color-coded, too!" *rubs hands together, as procyonines do* "Trusty old mnemonics, vecchio e infallibile! It helped me learn Itacavallian, and now, it's gonna help me learn Deuletsch! Gerbilman! I can see the essay in my mind already."

Gilda: "Wait... the robot blows up if I'm away from the base for too long? And why is the level called 'Eisfrei'? Isn't that 'ice-free'?"

Gilda: "AAUGH! Terence! Bastardo puzzolente!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "Hooked on Mnemonics" (Chapter 3, p1-4)

Gilda comes up with creative ways of remembering words in the Gerbilman language.

NOTE: The alt-text on this one is more limited due to the unconventional format pushing character limits.

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The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Gilda: "Uh, yeah, sorry about that, my bad." Chandler: "But, I do suppose I should stary your education under me, with a less stressful subject. Perhaps foreign language?" [ciconiiform deliverycock]: "Ciconiiform Delivery Service! Package for Chandler Spectrous." Chandler: "Huh. Speaking of which." Gilda: "How's a parcel gonna teach me foreign language? Wait, bubble wrap! Can I have the bubble wrap?"

[ciconiiform deliverycock]: "Thank you for choosing the Ciconiiform Delivery Service!" Chandler: "Sorry, Gil, but this one's got peanuts in it." Gilda: "Good grief." Chandler: "But never mind whether it's peanuts or bubble wrap protecting what's in the parcel, what's in the parcel's gonna help you learn Gerbilman. This town's founders' language. Same language family as Eaglish." Gilda: "Oh, hey, yeah! I've heard of this! [Hare Socks Vye]! Iconic RTS for the [Mech Catcher Hive]!" *notices censorship* "Wh-- wait, what? 'Hare Socks'? 'Mech Catcher'? What--" *losers don't troll copyright laws* "Oh, right. This is gonna be published. So we can't name-drop real things we show."

Chandler: "You familiar with the names of the levels in this game, Gilda?" Gilda: "Yeah! 'Abgrund', 'Vulkan', I believe 'Stadt' --" Chandler: "Okay, good." *manipulates scales to read the details of Gilda's assignment* Gilda: "Uh, what're you doing?" Chandler: "Giving your assignment. By the end of the day, I want you to have learned all the Gerbilman words in the first three categories, and the Eaglish translations of the words in the last. I figure an equal balance of elementary and niche topics will make things more interesting than how public school does it. Oh, and I've got a [Mech Catcher Hive] hooked up in the back room for you to test the cart. Test, not play." Gilda: "Well, I know the word for 'green'. 'Grün'. Obviously. So I think this'll come easy."

Chandler: "Well, then, you should pick up this language pretty easy. Of course, you'll have to if you want to fit in with the upper-class folk from Rotergarten and the other north side towns. Oh, and I want a paper on what you've learned." Gilda: "Paper, can it come with illustrations?" Chandler: "Sure, I don't see why not. As long as it shows what you've learned. And after that, I want to put you on the cash register. For math practice." Gilda: "Sounds like a plan, Mr. Spectrous!" *closes door behind her and takes a breath, before grabbing her hair* "'Too old for pigtails'. F*** off, Maddie, f*** off! Now, where does Mr. Spectrous keep the ribbons?"

#OTOGCOMIC: "Between Foolish and Fungus" (Chapter 2, p9-12)

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The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Chandler: *appears from camoflauge* "Gilda, that was very undignified." Gilda: "Understatement! Roz and Maddie are the w--" Chandler: "I wasn't talking about Roz and Maddie, Gilda. Although yes, they are, too. But I was specifically talking about *your* behavior." Gilda: "M-- my behavior?" Chandler: "'Between foolish and fungus', huh? Well, I can think of a word that comes between 'leech' and 'ludicrous'!"

Gilda: "Is it 'load'? Like what you're about to tell me?" Chandler: "No! It's this word!" Gilda: *reads word written across Chandler's scales* "'Loneliness'. Yeah, nice try. I'd rather be lonely than fall for the propaganda of the friendship industrial complex!" *ends up walking into Chandler's nose-horn. The action makes a 'NOSE' sound effect* "'Nose'? What kind of sound effect is that?"

Gilda: "Somehow I knew you'd do that. You know you get my blood and snot on my horn every time you do this, right?" Chandler: "I've handled unborn bird embryos and eaten balut. This? This is nothing. Friendship built the commune you live on, Gilda! And *my* friendship with *your* grandfather, has kept this store alive since his passing! So if I were you, I'd knock off this shitting on friendship you always do! It's sociopathic!" Gilda: "Don't shit on the thing that's gotten me burned, soaked, pushed off tree branches, and thrown into toilet-smelling bins? Si, I know enough about friendship. Like I said! Between 'foolish' and 'fungus' in the dictionary! It's an idea for fools, ugly and rotten like fungus, and I want no part in it!"

Chandler: "Friendship did not cause any of that, Gilda." Gilda: "Yes it did, Mr. Spectrous! You watched it happen just now! My idiot brother's friendship with Roz and Maddie! If that wasn't a thing, I'd not have them as bullies!" *has fantasy sequence of tumbling down a hill into a pond* Chandler: "Okay, Gilda, that is a slippery slope fallacy and you know it!" Gilda: "Look, Mr. Spectrous. I don't want to hear another word about friendship, okay? Especially not after getting assaulted by the f***ing Wylers! So JUST... F***ING... STOOOOOP!" Chandler: "Hmph! Well, this is not how to speak to your elders!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "Between Foolish and Fungus" (Chapter 2, p5-8)

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The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Chandler: "I thought I told you punks you were banned from this store!" Roz: "Only at the Apple Plaza location, you loser!" Maddie: "Yeah, you didn't say anything about here!" Chandler: "Oh, I haven't made it clear, have I? Well, then let me spell it out for the both of you! You are banned, from this store! The entire chain! Apple Plaza *and* here! And any future Griswold's, too! And if I catch you here again, I'll -- what the hell? Terence, put that scanner back! That is company property!" Terence: "Yeah, well, the CRTs are now *our* property! Here's the cash, now f*** off, loser!"

Chandler: "Yeah, you better run! You're all banned, you hear? And you stay away from me on the commune too, Grime!" Gilda: "Ma-gic-ow-wah-sweer-and-sow--" Roz: "Out of the way, toucan girl!" Gilda: "AIII-EEEEEEEEEE!!!!!" *falls, cup lands on nose* "Roz, I've told you before! Stop calling me 'toucan girl'!"

Roz: "When you're looking like that? Come on!" Maddie: "Hey, Roz, while she's on the ground, how's about me doing the thing?" Roz: "Oh, yeah!" Maddie: "Alright! Terence, hold this for me." *hands CRT over to Terence: "Here we go!" Gilda: "Oh, no!" Maddie: *grabs Gilda's braids* "Squirts... on... COMMAAAAAND!!!!!" Gilda: "AAAUUUGGGH!!!!!" Maddie: "Haha, she's like a f***ing squirt gun!" Roz: "Forget 'toucan girl', I know an ever better name. Procyon GUSHAH!!!!! NYAHAHAHAHAHAAA!" Maddie: "Huhuhuhuhuh." Terence: "Hehhh-heh."

Maddie: "And you know, it just occurred to me. Girls your age are too old for pigtails!" *yanks out Gilda's ribbons* Gilda: "F*** you!" Roz: "Good thinking there, Maddie! And to think society claims that all bullying is a bad thing." Maddie: "I know, right? Gusher was looking like a fool! Well, she still does. But hopefully she'll have the sense to also ditch those stupid-ass gloves on her own!" Terence: "And the shoes." Maddie: "Right, those too. She looks like something out of the 1950s!" Roz: "She needs to learn shame." Gilda: "You're the ones who need to learn shame! Ines in the 50s knew good style! You freaks have *no* style, or class for that matter! I've laid *compost* that had more class than you! Compost that had *shit* in it! F***ing friendship! Comes between 'foolish' and 'fungus' in the dictionary! To the inferno with the whole concept!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "Between Foolish and Fungus" (Chapter 2, p1-4)

Gilda bothers a kiosk worker on her way into the mall.

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The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Gilda: *watches the Sweet and Sour be made as she makes a cute face... that eventually crosses the cuteness event horizon and turns ugly* Zucker: "Alright, here you go. Against better judgement, here's..." *notices Gilda's face* "AAAAAGH! Son of a f***! Stop making that face! You look like a Cronenberg creature!"

Zucker: "Anyways, here you go. The Sweet and Sour. Hell of a thing to be drinking at magic hour." Gilda: *screws her eyeball back into its socket and takes a sip. She loves the taste of it, as expressed in a... comedic way* "Oh yeah. Agrodolce. That's how ya do it. And what'd you say? Magic hour? Cool term, sir."

Gilda: "Well, I'd love to stay and chat, Mr. Zucker, but I know you've got work. And so do I. Mr. Spectrous is my teacher, he runs the Griswold's." Zucker: "Thanks for the bribe, I guess." Gilda: "Arrivederci!" *jumps on floor scrubber for a ride* "Ma-gic-ow-wah-sweet-and-sow-wah! Ma-gic-ow-wah-sweet-and-sow-wah!"

#OTOGCOMIC: "Magic Hour Sweet and Sour" (Chapter 1, p7-9)

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The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Gilda: "Well, it can't be anything good, whatever it is. That Roz and Maddie are always up to bad news!" Terence: "What do you know? You hardly ever see them." Gilda: "They like you. I know enough." *Terence punches her sending her skidding across the floor* "Bastardo!" *lands into a wall and gets up* "Wow, Terence! What a saint you are, assaulting a child in public!"

Gilda: "And of course you ran off already. Vigliacco!" *notices a kiosk for Zucker's as she wipes her nose* "EEEEEEEEEE!" *pounces* "ZUUUUUCAAAAAHHH-RUH!"

Zucker: "Why are you here, little miss? This kiosk doesn't open for another half-hour!" Gilda: "Oh, that's right. You work retail! It's like my grandma says, retail workers aren't paid enough to deal with bullshit! So let me throw in an extra Hamilton with my order. You know what I like!" Zucker: "Ughhh... the Sweet and Sour." Gilda: "Yep!" Zucker: "So let me get this straight." Gilda: "Sure!" Zucker: "You want a drink with sixty-four grams of sugar." Gilda: "Yeah!" Zucker: "At barely after ten in the morning." Gilda: "Uh-huh." Zucker: "And you're so impatient for it that you're telling me to open before my posted hours just to appease you?" Gilda: "Impatient? No, if I was impatient, I'd just be telling you to open like a grouchy boss. But you see, I'm a customer... who's bribing you."

#OTOGCOMIC: "Magic Hour Sweet and Sour" (Chapter 1, p4-6)

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The Phoenix of Grunvale

@phoenixofgrunvale.bsky.social

1 year ago

Gilda: *puts on gloves, shines her shoes, adjusts her braids, and pinches her cheeks, before doing the iconic Sonic Adventure pose*

Gilda: "Terence?" Terence: "Uhhhhh... huh?" Gilda: "Terence, wake up, you lazy f***. You know very well you're supposed to drive me to the mall this morning." Terence: "Ah, crap, it *is* Monday, isn't it?" Gilda: "Mm-hmm." Terence: "Yep, yep, I'll be quick. I got something I need to do there anyways."

Terence: "How is the mall this busy? It's barely past eight!" Gilda: "They're probably mostly managers and cyclists. Or employees, such as myself! Speaking of which, what're *you* here for? Besides dropping me off?" Terence: "Roz and Maddie want CRTs for something they don't want me talking about with anyone but them."

#OTOGCOMIC: "Magic Hour Sweet and Sour" (Chapter 1, p1-3)

Finally, the webcomic proper makes its Bluesky debut.

Gilda bothers a kiosk worker on her way into the mall.

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